1
00:00:41,515 --> 00:00:43,188
MAN: A great pally once said,
2
00:00:43,351 --> 00:00:47,231
"Christmas is a day that holds
all time together."
3
00:00:47,388 --> 00:00:49,493
I never really
believed it before now.
4
00:00:49,624 --> 00:00:50,694
People take from Christmas
5
00:00:50,858 --> 00:00:53,065
their memories of
happy times and sad,
6
00:00:53,227 --> 00:00:55,332
past, present and future.
7
00:00:55,496 --> 00:00:57,703
A moment on this one,
special day
8
00:00:57,865 --> 00:01:01,711
could forever change
how you see everything.
9
00:01:04,672 --> 00:01:06,242
BOY: Dear, Santa...
10
00:01:07,775 --> 00:01:11,587
♪ I have a secret Christmas wish
11
00:01:11,746 --> 00:01:14,625
♪ I know you know it well
12
00:01:14,782 --> 00:01:18,229
♪ It's something that
I want so much
13
00:01:18,386 --> 00:01:21,367
♪ I cannot even tell
14
00:01:21,522 --> 00:01:25,095
♪ If I believe
with all my heart
15
00:01:25,259 --> 00:01:28,900
♪ I know it can come true
16
00:01:29,063 --> 00:01:32,806
♪ But if that never happens
17
00:01:32,967 --> 00:01:38,974
♪ Still I'll always
believe in you ♪
18
00:01:40,875 --> 00:01:43,879
MAN: Sweet, eh?
We'll get to that kid later.
19
00:01:46,213 --> 00:01:50,184
For me, my memories of Christmas
will never be quite the same again.
20
00:01:50,384 --> 00:01:53,297
All I wanted to be
was something else.
21
00:01:53,454 --> 00:01:55,798
Something better
than I thought! was.
22
00:01:55,956 --> 00:01:58,994
This is my story.
And it's all true.
23
00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:00,764
- My name is Bernard.
(SNORING)
24
00:02:00,928 --> 00:02:02,771
And I'm an elf.
25
00:02:04,265 --> 00:02:05,608
(EXCLAIMS)
26
00:02:05,766 --> 00:02:08,110
(GROANS, MUTTERING)
27
00:02:08,269 --> 00:02:10,442
(SIGHS)
28
00:02:13,007 --> 00:02:14,509
Oh, no!
29
00:02:14,675 --> 00:02:17,121
Mint chocolate cookies,
I slept in!
30
00:02:18,245 --> 00:02:19,724
Not today, not today!
31
00:02:27,154 --> 00:02:28,997
Oh, where the blinking...?
32
00:02:29,156 --> 00:02:31,261
Ah, there you are.
33
00:02:32,293 --> 00:02:34,000
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
34
00:02:34,161 --> 00:02:35,697
(GASPS) No pants!
35
00:03:03,290 --> 00:03:07,033
Wait! Wait up!
(TRAIN WHISTLING)
36
00:03:10,865 --> 00:03:12,242
Wait up!
37
00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:14,004
Hold the train!
38
00:03:14,635 --> 00:03:16,546
Oh! (GRUNTS)
39
00:03:19,073 --> 00:03:20,746
(GASPS) Huh?
40
00:03:29,049 --> 00:03:30,585
(EXCLAIMS)
(ALL GASP)
41
00:03:30,751 --> 00:03:33,129
Ah! Thanks!
42
00:03:33,320 --> 00:03:34,924
Merry Christmas!
43
00:03:41,362 --> 00:03:42,636
Excuse me, sorry!
44
00:03:42,830 --> 00:03:44,537
Excuse me, coming through!
45
00:03:44,698 --> 00:03:47,042
Excuse me! Excuse me!
46
00:03:47,201 --> 00:03:48,942
Oh, sorry!
47
00:03:52,006 --> 00:03:53,280
Morning, Blitz!
48
00:04:11,258 --> 00:04:13,260
(GRUNTS)
49
00:04:23,871 --> 00:04:26,442
MAN: Still no sign of the
North Pole, Mr. Baddington.
50
00:04:26,607 --> 00:04:30,919
(GROWLING) Where are you, fat man?
51
00:04:31,078 --> 00:04:34,150
(ALL GASP)
What are you staring at?
52
00:04:34,315 --> 00:04:35,316
Do something useful
53
00:04:35,483 --> 00:04:37,520
and get my mother on the com.
(DOOR SLAMS)
54
00:04:38,385 --> 00:04:40,331
There will be no need for that.
55
00:04:40,788 --> 00:04:44,759
Mother, what a
delightful surprise.
56
00:04:44,925 --> 00:04:47,235
You look even more
radiant than ever.
57
00:04:47,394 --> 00:04:49,670
Luminous and brilliant,
58
00:04:49,830 --> 00:04:53,573
like a... a...
newly-bloomed rose,
59
00:04:53,701 --> 00:04:56,307
shimmering with dew
in the morning...
60
00:04:56,470 --> 00:04:59,610
That's enough bottom-snogging
from you, boy.
61
00:04:59,773 --> 00:05:01,582
This is hardly a pleasure trip.
62
00:05:01,742 --> 00:05:04,621
Need I remind you that you have
a shipping empire to run?
63
00:05:04,778 --> 00:05:07,156
Since you have taken the
Quickest Airborne Delivery,
64
00:05:07,314 --> 00:05:11,091
the only thing you have
managed to deliver is failure.
65
00:05:11,252 --> 00:05:15,701
Of course. It's still marvelous
to finally have you here.
66
00:05:15,856 --> 00:05:17,301
Put a sock in it!
67
00:05:17,458 --> 00:05:20,302
Christmas Eve is the busiest
day of the year for us,
68
00:05:20,461 --> 00:05:25,968
and here you are, chasing
a mystical, flying elf!
69
00:05:32,506 --> 00:05:34,383
I'm here for the presentation.
70
00:05:34,542 --> 00:05:37,182
- Name.
- Bernard D. Elf.
71
00:05:37,344 --> 00:05:39,187
- You're late!
- I know, I'm sorry.
72
00:05:39,346 --> 00:05:41,326
My alarm clock was broken
and I forgot my pants.
73
00:05:41,482 --> 00:05:44,827
(GASPS)
Yeah, I'm wearing them now.
74
00:05:44,985 --> 00:05:47,226
- Down the hall, back...
- Thanks!
75
00:05:47,388 --> 00:05:48,833
You're out of time.
76
00:05:48,989 --> 00:05:50,434
And voila!
77
00:05:50,624 --> 00:05:53,002
With my electrified
chipmunk decoy,
78
00:05:53,160 --> 00:05:56,198
unwanted Christmas tree guests
will be a thing of the past.
79
00:05:56,363 --> 00:05:59,071
One little nuzzle
of the nose, and he'll...
80
00:05:59,233 --> 00:06:01,975
Good morning, everyone!
(YELPING)
81
00:06:03,470 --> 00:06:05,848
Uh... Oops.
82
00:06:06,006 --> 00:06:08,008
Uh, sorry I'm a bit late.
83
00:06:08,175 --> 00:06:11,179
I'm sorry, Bernard, but
you've missed your time slot.
84
00:06:11,345 --> 00:06:13,552
- Missed your time slot.
- Please?
85
00:06:13,714 --> 00:06:16,991
I've been working all year on
this invention. It's my best yet!
86
00:06:17,117 --> 00:06:21,190
Better than the mind eraser
invention from last year?
87
00:06:23,857 --> 00:06:26,633
Santa sightings, unavoidable, right?
88
00:06:26,827 --> 00:06:28,033
Maybe.
89
00:06:28,195 --> 00:06:31,199
But what if we could erase them forever?
90
00:06:31,365 --> 00:06:32,366
(GASPING)
91
00:06:32,533 --> 00:06:36,413
Let's imagine that this
toy doll is a little girl
92
00:06:36,570 --> 00:06:38,072
who's just seen Santa.
93
00:06:38,238 --> 00:06:41,447
Now, one quick zap...
94
00:06:41,609 --> 00:06:43,885
(ALL YELLING)
95
00:06:45,846 --> 00:06:50,295
Who are you and why are you wearing
that ridiculous elf costume?
96
00:06:50,451 --> 00:06:53,227
- Hey, I'm wearing one, too.
- Me, too.
97
00:06:53,387 --> 00:06:55,594
- We're all wearing them.
- Where are we?
98
00:06:55,756 --> 00:06:58,635
WOMAN: Some kind of
Christmas nightmare.
99
00:06:58,792 --> 00:07:00,738
WOMAN 2: What is Christmas?
100
00:07:00,894 --> 00:07:04,137
- It took us months to recover.
- Months to recover.
101
00:07:04,298 --> 00:07:08,303
Poor Nutmeg still can't
remember his own name sometimes.
102
00:07:08,469 --> 00:07:10,574
Isn't that right, Nutmeg?
103
00:07:13,907 --> 00:07:15,648
- See?
BERNARD: - Please!
104
00:07:15,809 --> 00:07:17,880
I've worked on this
all year long.
105
00:07:18,045 --> 00:07:19,991
MAN: - No.
WOMAN: - Say no. Say no.
106
00:07:20,147 --> 00:07:23,959
MAN 2: - Don't do it.
- You've got one minute.
107
00:07:24,118 --> 00:07:25,324
Thank you.
(ALL GROANING)
108
00:07:25,486 --> 00:07:27,989
(CLEARS THROAT) Ask yourselves,
109
00:07:28,155 --> 00:07:32,865
what is the one thing Santa
can't fit into his bag?
110
00:07:34,762 --> 00:07:36,901
The answer, of course, is...
111
00:07:37,064 --> 00:07:38,566
...memories!
112
00:07:38,732 --> 00:07:41,235
Christmas memories, to be exact.
113
00:07:41,402 --> 00:07:43,973
Every year, millions are created,
114
00:07:44,138 --> 00:07:45,481
but where do they go?
115
00:07:45,639 --> 00:07:48,279
The get lost in our brains.
116
00:07:48,442 --> 00:07:51,980
And my machine locks on to
our happiest Christmas memory
117
00:07:52,146 --> 00:07:54,490
and projects it
right in front of us.
118
00:07:54,648 --> 00:07:57,925
Exactly what purpose
does this serve?
119
00:07:58,085 --> 00:08:00,497
Raising people's Christmas
spirits, of course.
120
00:08:00,654 --> 00:08:02,861
(CHUCKLES, CLEARS THROAT)
I need a volunteer.
121
00:08:03,023 --> 00:08:05,264
(ALL SCREAMING) Ooh!
122
00:08:09,063 --> 00:08:11,543
I'm not going. Let go!
(GRUNTS)
123
00:08:12,366 --> 00:08:14,039
Minty, thanks for volunteering.
124
00:08:16,170 --> 00:08:18,116
(WHIMPERS)
125
00:08:18,272 --> 00:08:19,808
Oooh.
126
00:08:19,973 --> 00:08:22,010
(BUZZING) (GASPS)
127
00:08:23,777 --> 00:08:27,122
Great Grand-elf's
chocolate-chunk cookies!
128
00:08:27,247 --> 00:08:30,251
(GIGGLES) They were my favorite.
129
00:08:30,451 --> 00:08:32,226
- Oh!
- Oh, this is great.
130
00:08:32,386 --> 00:08:35,230
(ALL CLAMORING)
131
00:08:35,389 --> 00:08:36,732
Don't be a cinnamon twist!
132
00:08:37,424 --> 00:08:39,165
(DEVICE HUMMING)
133
00:08:40,661 --> 00:08:43,574
My first Christmas kiss.
134
00:08:43,731 --> 00:08:45,472
Give me that!
135
00:08:47,835 --> 00:08:50,645
(CACKLING) Yes!
Yee-haw!
136
00:08:50,771 --> 00:08:53,411
Ooh, this isn't so hard.
137
00:08:53,574 --> 00:08:55,952
(SPLUTTERING)
Sir, please, careful.
138
00:08:56,143 --> 00:08:57,451
No, no, no, don't do that.
139
00:08:57,644 --> 00:09:01,558
Let me. No, no, no!
No, not now!
140
00:09:01,715 --> 00:09:03,524
Oh, man!
141
00:09:08,856 --> 00:09:12,065
(ALL MURMURING)
Ah! Back on.
142
00:09:12,226 --> 00:09:15,435
Just a small, uh, power surge.
143
00:09:15,596 --> 00:09:17,598
Can you believe those Christmas lights?
(NERVOUS CHUCKLE)
144
00:09:17,765 --> 00:09:19,369
One goes out, they all go out.
145
00:09:19,533 --> 00:09:22,776
- That will be all, Bernard.
- All, Bernard!
146
00:09:22,936 --> 00:09:24,745
But it worked.
It worked, you saw...
147
00:09:24,905 --> 00:09:27,681
And merry Christmas to you.
148
00:09:28,442 --> 00:09:31,013
Yes, sir.
Merry Christmas to you.
149
00:09:31,178 --> 00:09:33,124
And I'd better not see you back here
150
00:09:33,280 --> 00:09:37,126
with another one of your
hare-brained inventions.
151
00:09:37,284 --> 00:09:39,628
(GRUNTING)
152
00:09:39,787 --> 00:09:43,428
Santech is only for
the greatest elf minds, not...
153
00:09:43,590 --> 00:09:47,470
(INHALES)
...reindeer poop-scoopers.
154
00:09:48,529 --> 00:09:49,906
GUARD: Poor fellow.
155
00:09:50,063 --> 00:09:53,408
Poor fellow? He caused a
blackout on Christmas Eve.
156
00:09:56,770 --> 00:09:57,942
Piece of junk.
(ZAPPING)
157
00:09:58,105 --> 00:09:59,607
Ow!
158
00:10:00,541 --> 00:10:02,316
(GRUNTS)
159
00:10:05,045 --> 00:10:07,355
(DEVICE LANDS)
(MAN GRUNTS)
160
00:10:20,294 --> 00:10:22,570
(SIGHS)
161
00:10:39,980 --> 00:10:41,857
(SIGHS, SNIFFS)
162
00:10:48,121 --> 00:10:49,691
Hi, Dasher, hi, Dancer,
163
00:10:49,857 --> 00:10:51,598
Prancer, Vixen...
164
00:10:51,758 --> 00:10:55,797
Hi, Comet, hi, Cupid. Hi...
165
00:10:55,963 --> 00:10:57,374
Donner, where's Blixen?
166
00:10:57,531 --> 00:10:59,704
(GIBBERISH) Ooh!
167
00:10:59,867 --> 00:11:02,245
(STRAINING) You're on
my gingerbread basket!
168
00:11:02,436 --> 00:11:05,246
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
169
00:11:05,405 --> 00:11:07,009
(SIGHS)
170
00:11:07,174 --> 00:11:09,279
That thing still won't
translate to English, eh?
171
00:11:09,409 --> 00:11:12,686
Oh, jingle bells,
I can't do anything right.
172
00:11:13,313 --> 00:11:15,884
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
173
00:11:16,049 --> 00:11:18,393
If you're asking how
the presentation went,
174
00:11:18,552 --> 00:11:20,031
prepare to be underwhelmed.
175
00:11:20,187 --> 00:11:22,565
As usual, I'm a miserable failure.
176
00:11:22,723 --> 00:11:26,500
My Christmas memory machine
knocked the power out in the room.
177
00:11:26,660 --> 00:11:28,901
So embarrassing.
178
00:11:29,062 --> 00:11:32,066
But I guess I'll just have
to face the Christmas music.
179
00:11:32,232 --> 00:11:36,510
I'll never be one of
Santa's trusty inventors.
180
00:11:36,670 --> 00:11:38,411
(GRUNTING)
181
00:11:40,707 --> 00:11:42,550
(DOOR OPENING)
182
00:11:44,344 --> 00:11:46,517
(CLEARING THROAT)
183
00:11:46,680 --> 00:11:49,889
Ah! Mr. Claus, I'm so sorry,
sir. I'll get that right off.
184
00:11:50,050 --> 00:11:52,087
Ho, ho, ho!
That's nothing!
185
00:11:52,252 --> 00:11:55,358
You fly around the world behind
eight well-fed reindeer,
186
00:11:55,522 --> 00:11:57,729
as long as I have and...
(GUFFAWS)
187
00:11:57,891 --> 00:12:01,737
...and you get used to getting
hit with a few warm brownies.
188
00:12:03,063 --> 00:12:05,976
Say, what's this nifty contraption?
189
00:12:06,166 --> 00:12:07,668
It's a reindeer vocalizer.
190
00:12:07,834 --> 00:12:10,337
(BROADCASTING GIBBERISH)
191
00:12:10,470 --> 00:12:14,077
You made this?
How clever.
192
00:12:14,241 --> 00:12:16,152
It would be if I could
get it to speak English.
193
00:12:16,343 --> 00:12:18,345
Merry Christmas, Blitzen.
194
00:12:18,512 --> 00:12:20,253
Are you ready to fly tonight?
195
00:12:20,414 --> 00:12:22,121
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
196
00:12:22,282 --> 00:12:23,590
See?
197
00:12:23,750 --> 00:12:27,391
(SANTA RESPONDING IN GIBBERISH)
198
00:12:27,554 --> 00:12:28,794
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
199
00:12:35,462 --> 00:12:39,535
Works for me, I speak
all languages. Ho, ho, ho!
200
00:12:39,700 --> 00:12:42,146
Put down the brush
and come with me.
201
00:12:42,302 --> 00:12:44,475
There's something
I want to show you.
202
00:12:44,638 --> 00:12:49,485
Do you know there are tens of millions
of children who celebrate Christmas?
203
00:12:49,643 --> 00:12:52,419
Every year.
When I started,
204
00:12:52,579 --> 00:12:54,752
there were only a few thousand.
205
00:12:54,915 --> 00:12:57,088
Ever heard how I do it?
206
00:12:57,250 --> 00:12:59,662
Well, just rumors, sir.
207
00:12:59,820 --> 00:13:02,061
I haven't been snooping,
if that's what you mean,
208
00:13:02,222 --> 00:13:03,758
I swear, I don't go near the sleigh.
209
00:13:03,924 --> 00:13:05,961
Except to admire it, of course.
210
00:13:06,126 --> 00:13:08,106
And I found a cup holder,
which is a nice feature,
211
00:13:08,261 --> 00:13:09,467
but I don't look at
anything else, so...
212
00:13:09,629 --> 00:13:12,633
(CHUCKLES) I know.
You're a good egg.
213
00:13:12,799 --> 00:13:16,770
Go on. How do you
think I do it? Hmm?
214
00:13:17,270 --> 00:13:21,582
Well, uh... Some of the guys
think you teleport.
215
00:13:21,742 --> 00:13:24,780
That theory isn't
scientifically sound.
216
00:13:24,945 --> 00:13:26,583
Now, time travel, on the other hand...
217
00:13:26,747 --> 00:13:29,626
Oh, you're one clever little elf!
218
00:13:29,783 --> 00:13:32,662
(CHUCKLES)
You know your stuff. (LAUGHS)
219
00:13:32,819 --> 00:13:35,857
Santech's very first invention:
220
00:13:36,023 --> 00:13:38,697
the Time Globe.
221
00:13:38,859 --> 00:13:41,339
Absolutely tip-top secret.
222
00:13:41,495 --> 00:13:43,338
It's what started it all.
223
00:13:43,497 --> 00:13:46,478
Heh. Wouldn't be able
to keep up with my deliveries
224
00:13:46,633 --> 00:13:50,012
- if it weren't for this.
- It's real!
225
00:13:50,170 --> 00:13:51,205
Amazing! Can I see?
226
00:13:51,371 --> 00:13:54,352
Ho, ho, no.
No touching, now.
227
00:13:54,508 --> 00:13:56,510
This can also be very dangerous,
228
00:13:56,676 --> 00:13:58,622
lots of rules to follow.
229
00:13:58,745 --> 00:14:01,988
A very delicate thing,
the fabric of time.
230
00:14:02,149 --> 00:14:07,064
Once something is done,
it cannot be undone, only added to.
231
00:14:07,220 --> 00:14:11,362
Or if you were to interact with yourself:
incredibly dangerous.
232
00:14:11,525 --> 00:14:14,529
Speaking one word to yourself
would unravel our very...
233
00:14:14,694 --> 00:14:19,200
Well, we can go into that
some other time I suppose.
234
00:14:19,366 --> 00:14:23,405
Santa, why are you
telling me all of this?
235
00:14:23,570 --> 00:14:28,679
Because, uh... Well, because you
remind me of the elf that invented this.
236
00:14:28,842 --> 00:14:32,380
(CHUCKLING)
He was a lot like you.
237
00:14:32,546 --> 00:14:34,992
Though a bit older, if I remember.
238
00:14:35,148 --> 00:14:37,754
All the other elves
gave him a lot of guff
239
00:14:37,918 --> 00:14:40,421
because he thought differently
about everything, but...
240
00:14:40,587 --> 00:14:46,333
(CHUCKLES) But of course,
that's what made him so very special.
241
00:14:46,493 --> 00:14:49,030
You think I could
be like him one day?
242
00:14:49,196 --> 00:14:51,608
Mmm, I don't know.
243
00:14:51,765 --> 00:14:53,506
It all depends on you.
244
00:14:54,768 --> 00:14:56,577
Enough show and tell for now.
245
00:14:56,736 --> 00:14:59,216
You've got to finish getting
my reindeer ready for tonight.
246
00:14:59,372 --> 00:15:01,215
Of course, Santa, I'm right on it.
247
00:15:01,374 --> 00:15:03,012
- Good. Don't give up.
- I won't.
248
00:15:03,176 --> 00:15:05,087
Shoveling the
reindeer poop, I mean.
249
00:15:05,245 --> 00:15:07,919
The team has to be ready
by nightfall to be on schedule.
250
00:15:08,081 --> 00:15:10,083
Oh, yeah, that's what I meant.
251
00:15:10,250 --> 00:15:10,990
Merry Christmas.
252
00:15:11,451 --> 00:15:13,556
You hear that, Blitzen?
253
00:15:13,720 --> 00:15:16,633
I remind Santa
of a great inventor.
254
00:15:16,790 --> 00:15:20,602
And if he sees something
great in me, then...
255
00:15:20,760 --> 00:15:25,209
Well... maybe I can be great one day.
256
00:15:26,366 --> 00:15:30,405
♪ Sure, now I'm an ordinary elf
257
00:15:30,570 --> 00:15:32,777
♪ Doing ordinary things
258
00:15:32,939 --> 00:15:36,751
♪ That other ordinary elves
refuse to do
259
00:15:36,910 --> 00:15:38,753
♪ Like scooping up the reindeer...
260
00:15:38,912 --> 00:15:40,414
♪ You know what I do
261
00:15:40,580 --> 00:15:43,424
♪ But I, one day I'll
fly up on his sleigh
262
00:15:43,583 --> 00:15:45,290
♪ Going up, up and away
263
00:15:45,452 --> 00:15:47,159
♪ And all the other
elves will say
264
00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:49,300
♪ "Hey look"
(SINGS GIBBERISH)
265
00:15:49,456 --> 00:15:50,901
♪ "There he goes again
266
00:15:51,057 --> 00:15:53,333
♪ What a wonderful guy
267
00:15:53,493 --> 00:15:55,666
- ♪ How did he get to be
- ♪ Ooh
268
00:15:55,829 --> 00:15:58,742
♪ The elf he is today?"
269
00:16:00,333 --> 00:16:02,438
♪ That's when the future me
270
00:16:02,602 --> 00:16:06,516
- ♪ Will turn to them and say
ALL: - ♪ Ooh
271
00:16:06,673 --> 00:16:10,348
♪ Even a flea has prospects
272
00:16:10,510 --> 00:16:13,787
♪ Even a skunk has flair
273
00:16:13,947 --> 00:16:17,690
♪ Even a reindeer
with a sleigh in tow
274
00:16:17,851 --> 00:16:19,956
♪ Can beat a crow in the air
275
00:16:20,120 --> 00:16:23,863
♪ So even that crow
has prospects
276
00:16:24,024 --> 00:16:28,131
♪ Shouldn't an elf like me
277
00:16:28,295 --> 00:16:30,138
♪ Never give up till you're up
278
00:16:30,297 --> 00:16:34,939
♪ Where you want to be
(ALL HUMMING)
279
00:16:35,101 --> 00:16:37,911
♪ So if you keep on trying
280
00:16:38,104 --> 00:16:40,812
♪ Someone soon will see
281
00:16:40,974 --> 00:16:43,818
♪ You're not really
a mouse, you're a lion
282
00:16:43,977 --> 00:16:44,978
♪ Roar!
283
00:16:45,145 --> 00:16:47,386
♪ You can rely on me
284
00:16:47,547 --> 00:16:50,756
♪ Even a snake has prospects
285
00:16:50,951 --> 00:16:53,864
♪ Even a swan can bite
286
00:16:54,020 --> 00:16:57,661
♪ Even a tiny spider
spins a web
287
00:16:57,824 --> 00:17:00,361
♪ That will hold
you good and tight
288
00:17:00,527 --> 00:17:04,031
♪ So if everyone else
has prospects
289
00:17:04,197 --> 00:17:07,906
♪ Wouldn't you all agree?
290
00:17:08,068 --> 00:17:09,843
♪ Whether you're
two legs or four legs
291
00:17:10,003 --> 00:17:11,573
♪ Eight legs or more legs
292
00:17:11,738 --> 00:17:13,308
♪ Never give up till you're up
293
00:17:13,473 --> 00:17:15,009
(EXCLAIMING)
294
00:17:15,175 --> 00:17:17,451
♪ Never give up
when you're down
295
00:17:18,578 --> 00:17:20,319
♪ Never give up till your up
296
00:17:20,480 --> 00:17:25,088
♪ Where you want to be ♪
297
00:17:27,220 --> 00:17:29,700
(PEOPLE YELLING)
(HELICOPTERS THUNDERING)
298
00:17:33,827 --> 00:17:35,704
(ANGRY SHOUTING)
299
00:17:39,266 --> 00:17:41,769
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
300
00:17:44,237 --> 00:17:45,910
(GASPS)
301
00:17:52,379 --> 00:17:56,088
(GASPS)
(SHOUTING CONTINUES)
302
00:18:03,089 --> 00:18:05,433
(CACKLING)
303
00:18:05,592 --> 00:18:07,629
Oh, it wouldn't be Christmas
304
00:18:07,794 --> 00:18:11,708
without complete chaos
and utter panic.
305
00:18:11,831 --> 00:18:14,869
(INHALES DEEPLY)
Do you smell that?
306
00:18:15,035 --> 00:18:16,742
Cookies?
307
00:18:16,903 --> 00:18:18,644
Hot cocoa?
308
00:18:18,805 --> 00:18:22,252
Hmm, well you can
smell those things, too.
309
00:18:22,409 --> 00:18:27,586
But the more palpable odor
is that of vindication.
310
00:18:27,747 --> 00:18:29,420
After years of searching,
311
00:18:29,582 --> 00:18:32,620
the secrets of Santa's
sleigh will be mine.
312
00:18:32,786 --> 00:18:35,130
Look! A Pancake Palace!
313
00:18:35,288 --> 00:18:37,165
- I should...
- We should...
314
00:18:37,324 --> 00:18:38,826
...definitely check that out.
315
00:18:38,992 --> 00:18:41,097
Probably a lot of secrets in there.
316
00:18:41,261 --> 00:18:44,504
There'll be plenty of time
for pancakes later.
317
00:18:44,664 --> 00:18:46,905
First, find the sleigh.
318
00:18:47,067 --> 00:18:49,775
It is, after all, what we're here for.
319
00:18:49,936 --> 00:18:52,109
I want to know how a man that big
320
00:18:52,272 --> 00:18:55,344
gets around the world in one night.
321
00:18:55,508 --> 00:18:57,681
Find that sleigh!
322
00:18:57,844 --> 00:18:59,323
Let's start in the Pancake Palace.
323
00:18:59,479 --> 00:19:01,356
Good call.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
324
00:19:02,449 --> 00:19:03,792
(SNEEZES)
325
00:19:03,950 --> 00:19:05,987
(GASPS)
326
00:19:11,091 --> 00:19:12,126
(GASPS)
327
00:19:15,128 --> 00:19:17,074
(GROWLING)
328
00:19:24,804 --> 00:19:27,717
- Why, you little...
MAN: - Yeah, where's the sleigh?
329
00:19:27,874 --> 00:19:30,286
SANTA: You two are not
being very good this year.
330
00:19:30,410 --> 00:19:31,912
(BOTH GRUNTING)
331
00:19:32,112 --> 00:19:33,648
(GROANING)
332
00:19:38,218 --> 00:19:41,028
Kris Kringle. (CACKLES)
333
00:19:41,187 --> 00:19:43,394
Can I call you Kris?
334
00:19:43,556 --> 00:19:46,833
Let's have a chat in that
quaint workshop of yours.
335
00:19:46,993 --> 00:19:50,907
We've so much to discuss.
336
00:20:07,013 --> 00:20:08,390
(GRUNTING)
337
00:20:08,548 --> 00:20:11,028
Help! Blitz, we're under attack!
338
00:20:11,918 --> 00:20:13,056
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
339
00:20:13,219 --> 00:20:14,379
They're after the Time Globe.
340
00:20:14,521 --> 00:20:16,330
We've gotta hide it!
341
00:20:16,489 --> 00:20:18,093
(CRASHING AGAINST DOOR)
(GASPING)
342
00:20:18,992 --> 00:20:20,027
They're here!
343
00:20:22,862 --> 00:20:23,863
(GRUNTING)
344
00:20:24,030 --> 00:20:26,840
(REINDEER CHATTERING)
345
00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:30,209
Fine time to have a chat.
You want to help, maybe?
346
00:20:33,106 --> 00:20:34,676
(CRASH) They're coming!
347
00:20:34,841 --> 00:20:37,913
Oh, I just wish I had time to think.
348
00:20:38,077 --> 00:20:40,956
I just wish I... had... time.
349
00:20:41,114 --> 00:20:42,957
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
350
00:20:43,116 --> 00:20:44,561
Not now, I'm thinking.
351
00:20:44,717 --> 00:20:46,355
(EXCLAIMS)
352
00:20:47,954 --> 00:20:49,592
(GRUNTS)
353
00:20:50,890 --> 00:20:54,394
More time? The Time Globe!
354
00:20:54,561 --> 00:20:57,474
I can go back and warn Santa.
355
00:20:57,630 --> 00:20:59,576
Blitz, you're a genius!
356
00:21:00,366 --> 00:21:01,970
(SMACKS)
357
00:21:02,135 --> 00:21:03,978
Were you eating pancakes?
358
00:21:05,472 --> 00:21:06,972
- Move it in!
MAN 2: - They're here!
359
00:21:06,973 --> 00:21:08,043
MAN: Go, go, go!
360
00:21:08,208 --> 00:21:09,551
Where the elf is it?
361
00:21:09,709 --> 00:21:11,518
MAN: Spread out.
You check that side.
362
00:21:11,711 --> 00:21:14,385
MAN 2: - We're clear.
MAN: - Got anything?
363
00:21:14,547 --> 00:21:17,756
MAN 3: - Where is it?
- Yes!
364
00:21:18,551 --> 00:21:21,054
- There!
- Get it!
365
00:21:23,656 --> 00:21:26,830
(GIVES COMMAND)
366
00:21:26,993 --> 00:21:28,666
(GRUNTING)
367
00:21:28,828 --> 00:21:31,274
A twist here and a pop there.
368
00:21:31,431 --> 00:21:32,842
Where do they keep the directions?
369
00:21:32,999 --> 00:21:35,809
(GROANING) Come on, come on!
370
00:21:35,969 --> 00:21:37,141
(EXCLAIMING)
371
00:21:37,303 --> 00:21:39,647
Why won't you work?
372
00:21:42,475 --> 00:21:45,456
(EXCLAIMING)
He's activated the sleigh!
373
00:21:48,147 --> 00:21:49,956
I have?
How did I do that?
374
00:21:50,116 --> 00:21:51,959
- Get him!
- Move it out!
375
00:21:52,118 --> 00:21:54,655
(ALL YELLING)
376
00:21:54,821 --> 00:21:59,600
(DEVICE THRUMMING)
(MEN SCREAMING)
377
00:22:04,597 --> 00:22:07,134
(REINDEER SNORING)
378
00:22:15,141 --> 00:22:16,677
(FOOT SQUISHES)
(GASPS)
379
00:22:16,843 --> 00:22:18,049
(SNIFFS)
380
00:22:18,211 --> 00:22:21,215
Oh, come on, I just cleaned up in here.
381
00:22:21,381 --> 00:22:23,418
(BLITZEN SNORING LOUDLY)
382
00:22:26,619 --> 00:22:29,122
(GROANING)
383
00:22:31,724 --> 00:22:35,297
(WHISPERING) Hey. Hey, Blitz. Wake up.
384
00:22:35,461 --> 00:22:38,499
(SPEAKS GIBBERISH)
385
00:22:38,665 --> 00:22:41,874
Listen to me.
I know this sounds crazy,
386
00:22:42,035 --> 00:22:46,006
but I'm pretty sure
I've traveled back in time.
387
00:22:47,807 --> 00:22:49,047
(SIGHS)
388
00:22:49,208 --> 00:22:51,017
Would you wake up?
This is serious!
389
00:22:51,177 --> 00:22:53,384
This big, scary man
drops out of the sky,
390
00:22:53,546 --> 00:22:56,152
the North Pole is invaded,
they start rounding up elves,
391
00:22:56,316 --> 00:22:58,557
all of these lights shine down
and everything and...
392
00:22:58,718 --> 00:23:02,325
There was this girl
who saved me, and...
393
00:23:02,488 --> 00:23:05,526
You don't believe me,
do you? (SIGHS)
394
00:23:05,692 --> 00:23:09,504
(GRUNTING) Come on!
395
00:23:09,662 --> 00:23:12,939
Wait. Wait, I can...
I can prove it.
396
00:23:13,099 --> 00:23:14,908
I can show you that
I traveled back in time.
397
00:23:15,068 --> 00:23:16,513
Come with me.
(GRUMBLING)
398
00:23:16,669 --> 00:23:20,549
(COMPLAINING IN GIBBERISH)
399
00:23:20,707 --> 00:23:23,119
(SNORING LOUDLY)
400
00:23:27,347 --> 00:23:29,349
(GASPS) I told you.
401
00:23:29,515 --> 00:23:33,361
You're looking at the world's
first time-traveling elf.
402
00:23:39,626 --> 00:23:42,698
With the world's most obnoxious snore.
403
00:23:46,366 --> 00:23:49,279
Now, listen. It won't be long
before those guys get here.
404
00:23:49,435 --> 00:23:52,780
We have to warn Santa and
the others. Are you with me?
405
00:23:54,207 --> 00:23:57,654
Good boy! Here.
(SNIFFS)
406
00:23:57,810 --> 00:24:01,587
Excuse you. You don't eat it,
you just smell it.
407
00:24:01,748 --> 00:24:04,285
Now, get a good sniff.
(SNIFFING)
408
00:24:04,450 --> 00:24:07,226
Smells just like Santa, doesn't it?
409
00:24:07,387 --> 00:24:08,559
Got it?
(PANTING)
410
00:24:08,721 --> 00:24:10,826
Good. Now, go find him.
411
00:24:20,466 --> 00:24:22,468
(SNIFFING)
412
00:24:29,308 --> 00:24:30,343
What is it, Blitz?
413
00:24:30,510 --> 00:24:32,820
(EXCLAIMING IN GIBBERISH)
414
00:24:32,979 --> 00:24:34,424
The Pancake Palace.
415
00:24:34,580 --> 00:24:36,526
We're looking for Santa,
not breakfast.
416
00:24:36,683 --> 00:24:38,754
(GIBBERISH)
417
00:24:38,885 --> 00:24:41,491
Santa does love pancakes.
418
00:24:45,058 --> 00:24:47,504
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
419
00:24:47,660 --> 00:24:49,264
Welcome to the Pancake Palace.
420
00:24:49,429 --> 00:24:52,433
Try our streusel, butterscotch chip
and caramel-filled buttermilk flapjacks,
421
00:24:52,598 --> 00:24:54,199
topped with powdered sugar,
whipped cream
422
00:24:54,333 --> 00:24:56,506
and crushed candy canes.
Or try the Santa special,
423
00:24:56,669 --> 00:24:58,512
steaming hot cocoa
pancakes topped with...
424
00:24:58,671 --> 00:25:00,505
No, we can't eat pancakes
at a time like this.
425
00:25:00,506 --> 00:25:02,144
We need to find Santa.
426
00:25:05,812 --> 00:25:07,519
This isn't working.
427
00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:11,856
I'm too short to see everywhere.
I need a higher vantage point.
428
00:25:16,055 --> 00:25:17,728
Ah.
429
00:25:22,628 --> 00:25:24,107
Hold it steady, Blitz.
430
00:25:26,132 --> 00:25:29,079
Uh, everyone, can I
have your attention?
431
00:25:29,235 --> 00:25:31,010
(CHATTERING CEASES) Good, hi.
432
00:25:31,170 --> 00:25:33,912
I have urgent news.
We don't have much time.
433
00:25:34,073 --> 00:25:36,576
There are people coming,
outsiders, from, um...
434
00:25:38,044 --> 00:25:40,320
...the outside. I don't
know who they are, exactly,
435
00:25:40,480 --> 00:25:43,188
but they want to capture Santa
and steal his sleigh.
436
00:25:43,349 --> 00:25:45,886
Well, not the sleigh, itself,
but there are secrets held...
437
00:25:46,052 --> 00:25:47,531
Gumdrop, this is Sugar Plum.
438
00:25:47,687 --> 00:25:50,531
We've got a crazy on our hands.
You got eyes on Big Red?
439
00:25:50,690 --> 00:25:54,001
- I'm on him.
- How does it look out there?
440
00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:57,164
Not a creature is stirring.
Not even a mouse.
441
00:25:59,265 --> 00:26:00,744
Welcome to the Pancake Palace...
442
00:26:00,900 --> 00:26:02,379
WOMAN: - Hi, Santa
- Santa!
443
00:26:02,535 --> 00:26:04,947
WOMAN: It's Santa!
(PEOPLE CLAMORING)
444
00:26:05,104 --> 00:26:06,242
BERNARD: Listen to me!
445
00:26:06,405 --> 00:26:08,851
Santa! Blitz, it's...
446
00:26:11,010 --> 00:26:13,388
Oh, you are unbelievable!
447
00:26:13,546 --> 00:26:16,220
Santa! (GRUNTING)
448
00:26:18,184 --> 00:26:19,356
Santa!
449
00:26:21,220 --> 00:26:22,893
They're coming to get you,
Santa, you're in danger!
450
00:26:23,055 --> 00:26:24,728
Santa!
(GRUNTING)
451
00:26:25,958 --> 00:26:28,529
Lump of coal in the stocking.
Threat neutralized.
452
00:26:28,694 --> 00:26:30,264
Nice tackle, partner.
453
00:26:30,429 --> 00:26:31,931
(GRUNTING)
454
00:26:34,767 --> 00:26:37,145
You! You're the one who...
455
00:26:37,303 --> 00:26:39,909
Take this marshmallow head
back to base for questioning.
456
00:26:40,072 --> 00:26:41,949
(GRUNTING, MUFFLED)
457
00:26:44,644 --> 00:26:47,488
(MUFFLED YELLING)
You're making a big mistake!
458
00:26:47,647 --> 00:26:48,990
I need to warn Santa.
459
00:26:49,148 --> 00:26:51,492
Someone's coming and they're
after the Time Globe!
460
00:26:51,651 --> 00:26:54,393
Let me go! Santa!
(GASPS)
461
00:26:55,822 --> 00:26:56,823
(PEOPLE CLAMORING)
MAN: Santa, sir.
462
00:26:56,989 --> 00:26:58,764
Your beard stylist had to cancel.
463
00:26:58,925 --> 00:27:00,131
He has the chimney flu.
464
00:27:00,293 --> 00:27:01,795
Would you like me to reschedule?
465
00:27:06,165 --> 00:27:08,645
Blitz, over here!
466
00:27:08,801 --> 00:27:11,611
Listen, you have to find the other me.
467
00:27:11,771 --> 00:27:14,684
I should be on my way to Santech
for the presentation right now.
468
00:27:14,841 --> 00:27:18,482
You have to convince me to warn
everybody about the invasion.
469
00:27:18,644 --> 00:27:21,591
(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
470
00:27:21,747 --> 00:27:24,091
I don't know what that means.
But do whatever it takes.
471
00:27:24,217 --> 00:27:27,460
Do you understand? Stop me and get me
to listen to you no matter what!
472
00:27:27,620 --> 00:27:29,497
This is more important
than the presentation.
473
00:27:29,655 --> 00:27:31,896
Santa is in real danger!
474
00:27:32,091 --> 00:27:33,661
BERNARD 1: Excuse me. Coming through!
475
00:27:33,826 --> 00:27:35,360
BERNARD 2: - There I am!
- Oh, sorry!
476
00:27:35,361 --> 00:27:37,170
Go, go!
477
00:27:49,041 --> 00:27:50,850
(GROANING)
478
00:27:51,010 --> 00:27:53,012
(GASPS)
479
00:27:56,949 --> 00:27:58,451
Where am I?
480
00:27:58,584 --> 00:28:00,325
The Christmas Defense Department.
481
00:28:00,853 --> 00:28:02,333
The Christmas De-who
and the what now?
482
00:28:02,455 --> 00:28:04,366
You know how Santa knows
when you are sleeping?
483
00:28:04,523 --> 00:28:07,367
And knows when you're awake?
That's us!
484
00:28:07,526 --> 00:28:10,837
I'm Agent Snowy and you, little elf,
485
00:28:10,997 --> 00:28:12,738
have a lot of explaining to do.
486
00:28:12,899 --> 00:28:14,537
Well, I know what this looks like.
487
00:28:14,700 --> 00:28:18,876
But there is a perfectly
logical explanation.
488
00:28:19,038 --> 00:28:22,383
- I'm listening.
- First off, I'm from the future.
489
00:28:22,541 --> 00:28:24,418
Just to put that out there.
490
00:28:27,980 --> 00:28:29,482
I believe him.
(GASPS)
491
00:28:33,319 --> 00:28:34,855
I'm being the good cop.
492
00:28:36,155 --> 00:28:37,395
Agent Shortbread!
493
00:28:37,556 --> 00:28:39,934
Do you have his naughty
or nice record up yet?
494
00:28:40,092 --> 00:28:42,402
Just one second.
(COMPUTERS HUMMING)
495
00:28:42,561 --> 00:28:44,370
Let's see...
496
00:28:44,530 --> 00:28:47,409
Bernard D. Elf. Hmm.
497
00:28:47,566 --> 00:28:49,978
Height: three feet.
Favorite candy: gumdrops.
498
00:28:50,169 --> 00:28:54,174
Occupation...
poop-shoveler.
499
00:28:54,340 --> 00:28:56,581
(CLEARS THROAT)
Director of Droppings.
500
00:28:56,742 --> 00:28:59,951
- Excuse me?
- I prefer "Director of Droppings."
501
00:29:00,112 --> 00:29:01,614
"Disposal Administrator."
502
00:29:01,781 --> 00:29:03,419
I am a professional, after all.
503
00:29:03,582 --> 00:29:05,619
This one's a real piece of work.
504
00:29:05,785 --> 00:29:08,425
- Claims to be from the future.
- Uh, everyone, can I...
505
00:29:08,587 --> 00:29:10,726
(SHORTBREAD) Something
about a Time Globe.
506
00:29:10,890 --> 00:29:13,200
If there were such a thing
as a time travel globe,
507
00:29:13,359 --> 00:29:16,101
which we cannot confirm
or deny the existence of,
508
00:29:16,262 --> 00:29:17,900
how would you know of its existence?
509
00:29:18,064 --> 00:29:20,237
If it were to exist.
Hmm?!
510
00:29:20,399 --> 00:29:23,846
That is the most confusing
question I've ever heard.
511
00:29:25,471 --> 00:29:27,883
Answer it!
(SIGHS)
512
00:29:28,040 --> 00:29:30,316
- Santa showed me.
- Would Santa confirm
513
00:29:30,476 --> 00:29:31,887
that he showed you the Time Globe?
514
00:29:32,011 --> 00:29:35,117
He hasn't shown me it yet.
He showed it to me
515
00:29:35,281 --> 00:29:37,955
after I caused the blackout
in the Santech building.
516
00:29:38,117 --> 00:29:41,758
(LAUGHING) Oh, this just
keeps getting better!
517
00:29:41,921 --> 00:29:44,094
And when, exactly,
does that happen?
518
00:29:44,256 --> 00:29:46,236
Hmm?
(ALARM BLARING)
519
00:29:46,392 --> 00:29:49,464
- What's going on?
- Any minute now.
520
00:29:49,628 --> 00:29:52,472
We've got a problem.
We've got no power anywhere.
521
00:29:52,631 --> 00:29:55,134
The cloaking device is down.
Were exposed!
522
00:29:55,301 --> 00:29:58,680
I need more power!
523
00:30:07,847 --> 00:30:11,761
Sir, I think the equipment
is malfunctioning.
524
00:30:11,917 --> 00:30:13,988
- I'm... I'm getting a blop.
- You mean a blip?
525
00:30:14,153 --> 00:30:18,192
No, sir, it's a blop. It's far
too large to be a blip.
526
00:30:18,357 --> 00:30:21,497
Put it onscreen for Mommy.
527
00:30:24,296 --> 00:30:27,505
Mommy, there it is!
The North Pole!
528
00:30:27,666 --> 00:30:29,976
Let me see.
529
00:30:32,204 --> 00:30:33,285
What are you talking about?
530
00:30:33,439 --> 00:30:35,680
I don't see any North Pole.
531
00:30:35,841 --> 00:30:38,344
What? Impossible.
532
00:30:39,879 --> 00:30:43,349
(SARCASTIC LAUGH)
Oh, look. Nothing!
533
00:30:43,516 --> 00:30:46,190
No workshop. No sleigh.
No secrets.
534
00:30:46,352 --> 00:30:47,888
More failure?
535
00:30:48,054 --> 00:30:50,056
(SHEEPISH LAUGH)
(BOTH GASP)
536
00:30:50,222 --> 00:30:53,726
If you do not have Santa's
sleigh by midnight tonight,
537
00:30:53,893 --> 00:30:56,840
you are cut off!
(GASPS)
538
00:30:56,996 --> 00:30:58,498
You'll be living on a deserted island
539
00:30:58,664 --> 00:30:59,836
when I'm through with you.
540
00:30:59,999 --> 00:31:01,910
Is that clear?
541
00:31:02,068 --> 00:31:04,571
I will find it, Mommy.
542
00:31:04,737 --> 00:31:07,013
And all of the secrets it holds.
543
00:31:07,173 --> 00:31:11,883
Then QAD will truly be the quickest
package delivery service...
544
00:31:14,046 --> 00:31:15,684
...in the world.
545
00:31:18,517 --> 00:31:20,554
Find that blip.
546
00:31:20,719 --> 00:31:24,667
That... That thing
that we saw on the radar.
547
00:31:24,824 --> 00:31:28,067
Take me there now!
Whoa!
548
00:31:32,865 --> 00:31:35,345
(POWER GRID HUMMING)
549
00:31:36,936 --> 00:31:38,074
It's working.
550
00:31:38,237 --> 00:31:40,183
Power is restored to the hologram.
551
00:31:40,339 --> 00:31:43,548
- Were we seen?
- It's too early to tell.
552
00:31:43,709 --> 00:31:45,848
Looks like you were right, Bernard.
553
00:31:46,011 --> 00:31:47,012
Bernard?
554
00:31:48,013 --> 00:31:50,391
He's getting away!
555
00:31:50,549 --> 00:31:52,392
Hold it right there!
556
00:31:52,551 --> 00:31:55,725
(BOTH GRUNTING)
(ALARM BLARING)
557
00:31:56,889 --> 00:31:58,334
Don't let him get away!
558
00:32:00,192 --> 00:32:01,398
(GUMDROP) Get back here!
559
00:32:06,198 --> 00:32:07,404
Which way did he go?
560
00:32:14,106 --> 00:32:15,983
(MAN SNIFFING) Cookie breath!
561
00:32:16,142 --> 00:32:17,621
He went that way!
562
00:32:17,776 --> 00:32:19,756
(ELEVATOR BUTTONS DINGING)
563
00:32:36,729 --> 00:32:39,403
- What the...?
- Hah! Found you!
564
00:32:39,565 --> 00:32:41,511
Get him!
565
00:32:43,235 --> 00:32:44,737
(GRUNTING)
566
00:32:48,507 --> 00:32:50,418
Get over here, you little...
567
00:32:50,576 --> 00:32:53,580
(ALL STRAINING)
(GRUNTING)
568
00:32:53,746 --> 00:32:55,817
COMPUTER VOICE: Welcome to the Mail-evator.
569
00:32:55,981 --> 00:32:58,484
(CHRISTMAS CAROL PLAYING)
570
00:33:02,154 --> 00:33:04,794
(BUZZING)
COMPUTER: Elevator out of service.
571
00:33:06,592 --> 00:33:07,969
(BUZZING)
572
00:33:10,129 --> 00:33:11,733
COMPUTER: Elevator operational.
573
00:33:11,931 --> 00:33:14,036
(YELLS)
(RUMBLING)
574
00:33:17,803 --> 00:33:20,181
(HOLLERING)
575
00:33:24,310 --> 00:33:27,257
(MUSIC FALTERS, STOPS)
576
00:33:28,847 --> 00:33:30,019
(GROANING)
577
00:33:30,182 --> 00:33:31,991
And I'd better not see you back here
578
00:33:32,151 --> 00:33:35,530
with another one of your
hare-brained inventions.
579
00:33:35,688 --> 00:33:38,328
(GRUNTING)
580
00:33:38,490 --> 00:33:42,461
Santech is only for the
greatest elf minds, not...
581
00:33:42,628 --> 00:33:46,007
(INHALES)
...reindeer poop-scoopers.
582
00:33:47,833 --> 00:33:49,210
GUARD: Poor fellow.
583
00:33:49,368 --> 00:33:52,212
Poor fellow? He caused a
blackout on Christmas Eve.
584
00:33:54,006 --> 00:33:56,077
It was me.
585
00:33:56,242 --> 00:33:58,449
Piece of junk!
(ZAPPING)
586
00:33:58,644 --> 00:33:59,748
Ow!
587
00:34:03,048 --> 00:34:04,550
(GRUNTS)
588
00:34:04,717 --> 00:34:06,162
(DEVICE LANDS)
(MAN GRUNTS)
589
00:34:07,987 --> 00:34:11,491
They found the North Pole
because of me.
590
00:34:12,424 --> 00:34:14,495
(SIGHS)
591
00:34:18,530 --> 00:34:20,510
♪ What kind of an elf
592
00:34:20,666 --> 00:34:22,646
♪ Runs away to sulk
593
00:34:22,835 --> 00:34:25,111
♪ When he's not the best?
594
00:34:25,271 --> 00:34:27,046
♪ Who bumbles along
595
00:34:27,206 --> 00:34:31,586
♪ Wearing last night's
dinner on his vest?
596
00:34:31,744 --> 00:34:33,849
♪ Insists that he's smart
597
00:34:34,013 --> 00:34:38,587
♪ When all other elves
declare he's dim?
598
00:34:38,751 --> 00:34:44,064
♪ A kind of an elf like him
599
00:34:45,457 --> 00:34:48,461
♪ Head in the clouds, Bernard
600
00:34:48,627 --> 00:34:51,608
♪ Heart on the floor
601
00:34:51,764 --> 00:34:54,643
♪ Best to go back
to the place you belong
602
00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:58,145
♪ Back where you were before
603
00:34:58,304 --> 00:35:01,251
♪ Time to regroup, Bernard
604
00:35:01,407 --> 00:35:04,445
♪ Time to repair
605
00:35:04,610 --> 00:35:06,590
♪ Time to go back to the poop
606
00:35:06,745 --> 00:35:08,418
♪ And the shoveling scoop
607
00:35:08,580 --> 00:35:11,618
♪ And that whiff in the air
608
00:35:11,784 --> 00:35:13,957
♪ That's where the future me
609
00:35:14,119 --> 00:35:18,226
♪ Will turn to them and say
610
00:35:18,390 --> 00:35:21,564
- ♪ Even a flea
- ♪ What kind of an elf
611
00:35:21,727 --> 00:35:26,767
♪ Doesn't realize when
the world's gone wrong
612
00:35:26,932 --> 00:35:30,675
♪ Who flounders around
like a dying fish
613
00:35:30,836 --> 00:35:33,009
- ♪ To a silly song
- ♪ And even that crow
614
00:35:33,172 --> 00:35:36,551
♪ You're best to rely on an elf
615
00:35:36,742 --> 00:35:39,621
- ♪ Like me
- ♪ Like me
616
00:35:39,778 --> 00:35:41,815
- ♪ Never give up
- ♪ Which is who that elf
617
00:35:41,980 --> 00:35:43,721
♪ Aspires to be
618
00:35:43,916 --> 00:35:45,589
♪ What kind of an elf
619
00:35:45,751 --> 00:35:49,324
♪ Doesn't shy away
from a mucky task?
620
00:35:49,488 --> 00:35:51,991
♪ What kind of an elf
621
00:35:52,157 --> 00:35:56,003
♪ Answers "Yes!"
no matter what you ask
622
00:35:56,161 --> 00:35:57,868
♪ What kind of an elf
623
00:35:58,030 --> 00:36:02,445
♪ Has the wherewithal
to put this right
624
00:36:02,601 --> 00:36:08,483
♪ An elf who'll
fight and never flee
625
00:36:08,640 --> 00:36:14,647
♪ A kind of an elf like me ♪
626
00:36:27,493 --> 00:36:28,528
Mr. Baddington?
627
00:36:29,995 --> 00:36:31,372
There's nothing here.
628
00:36:31,530 --> 00:36:33,737
Oh, it's here, all right.
629
00:36:33,899 --> 00:36:35,674
We're directly above the coordinates.
630
00:36:35,834 --> 00:36:37,245
We would see it, don't you think?
631
00:36:37,403 --> 00:36:40,748
Oh, of course.
Silly-billy me.
632
00:36:40,906 --> 00:36:45,013
Clearly, there is nothing there.
I mean, any rational person
633
00:36:45,177 --> 00:36:47,521
would see that there
is nothing beneath us
634
00:36:47,679 --> 00:36:50,091
but a bunch of mountains and snow.
635
00:36:50,249 --> 00:36:54,197
And not a clever facade
masking Santa's workshop.
636
00:36:54,353 --> 00:36:57,823
Surely not.
Only a madman would think
637
00:36:57,990 --> 00:37:02,530
we'll surely crash and explode
into fiery bits and pieces
638
00:37:02,694 --> 00:37:05,868
if we flew straight down...
639
00:37:07,266 --> 00:37:09,177
(YELLING)
640
00:37:18,744 --> 00:37:20,553
Aha!
641
00:37:25,083 --> 00:37:28,064
Merry Christmas to me!
642
00:37:32,691 --> 00:37:35,467
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
643
00:37:41,033 --> 00:37:43,035
(ANGRY SHOUTING)
644
00:37:43,202 --> 00:37:45,045
(GASPS)
645
00:37:54,146 --> 00:37:56,786
Excuse me!
Excuse me, coming through!
646
00:38:04,790 --> 00:38:06,497
(GASPS)
647
00:38:16,168 --> 00:38:18,478
(NEVILLE CACKLING)
648
00:38:18,637 --> 00:38:20,674
Oh, it wouldn't be Christmas
649
00:38:20,839 --> 00:38:24,685
without complete chaos and utter panic.
650
00:38:24,843 --> 00:38:28,086
(INHALES DEEPLY)
Do you smell that?
651
00:38:28,247 --> 00:38:29,624
MAN: Cookies?
652
00:38:29,781 --> 00:38:31,351
Hot cocoa?
653
00:38:31,517 --> 00:38:35,158
Hmm, well you can
smell those things, too.
654
00:38:35,320 --> 00:38:40,201
But the more palpable odor
is that of vindication.
655
00:38:41,026 --> 00:38:42,596
- Sorry!
- Hey!
656
00:38:42,761 --> 00:38:45,537
NEVILLE: There'll be plenty
of time for pancakes later.
657
00:38:45,697 --> 00:38:48,405
First, find the sleigh!
658
00:38:49,835 --> 00:38:51,335
MAN: Come on! Give it up!
(GASPS)
659
00:38:51,336 --> 00:38:53,373
Where's the sleigh, round boy?
660
00:38:56,375 --> 00:38:58,048
Yeah! Where's the sleigh?
661
00:38:58,210 --> 00:39:02,022
SANTA: You two are not
being very good this year.
662
00:39:02,180 --> 00:39:04,854
(GROANING)
663
00:39:07,052 --> 00:39:08,395
(CACKLING)
664
00:39:08,554 --> 00:39:10,227
(NEVILLE CONTINUING, INDISTINCT)
665
00:39:17,162 --> 00:39:20,507
(NEVILLE, THROUGH DOOR)
We've so much to discuss.
666
00:39:25,170 --> 00:39:28,049
We have something
in common, you and I.
667
00:39:28,206 --> 00:39:30,743
We're both in the delivery business.
668
00:39:30,909 --> 00:39:33,412
But unlike some lazy-pants
669
00:39:33,579 --> 00:39:36,685
jelly-bellied holiday showboats,
670
00:39:36,848 --> 00:39:41,763
we operate 365 days a year.
671
00:39:41,920 --> 00:39:43,900
It's hard to believe,
but once upon a time,
672
00:39:44,056 --> 00:39:46,593
Christmas was my favorite holiday.
673
00:39:46,758 --> 00:39:49,364
Singing carols,
eating fresh cookies...
674
00:39:49,528 --> 00:39:52,532
Oh, the memories.
675
00:39:52,698 --> 00:39:55,440
You know, that for years,
I looked up to you?
676
00:39:55,601 --> 00:39:59,515
I wanted to be
just... like... you.
677
00:40:00,839 --> 00:40:03,615
You were such a good boy.
678
00:40:03,775 --> 00:40:05,220
What happened to you?
679
00:40:05,377 --> 00:40:08,221
Hah! All-knowing, are we?
680
00:40:08,380 --> 00:40:10,087
Clearly not.
681
00:40:10,248 --> 00:40:12,922
What happened?
I grew up.
682
00:40:13,085 --> 00:40:15,622
I saw through your phony generosity,
683
00:40:15,787 --> 00:40:18,097
giving your worthless toys away,
684
00:40:18,256 --> 00:40:22,602
keeping naive children
drunk with sugary sweets,
685
00:40:22,761 --> 00:40:26,368
while you keep all of the
good stuff to yourself!
686
00:40:26,531 --> 00:40:28,067
I don't know what
you're talking about.
687
00:40:28,233 --> 00:40:29,940
Oh, no?
688
00:40:30,102 --> 00:40:33,572
How do you make it all around
the world in one night?
689
00:40:33,739 --> 00:40:36,811
Huh? Or fit all of those presents
690
00:40:36,975 --> 00:40:39,421
into one bag? Huh? Huh?
691
00:40:39,578 --> 00:40:41,251
How do you fly?
692
00:40:41,413 --> 00:40:43,450
How do you live forever?
693
00:40:43,615 --> 00:40:45,390
Huh? Huh? Huh?
694
00:40:45,550 --> 00:40:46,824
- Stop that!
- Sorry, sir.
695
00:40:46,985 --> 00:40:49,295
Every year, I wrote to you,
696
00:40:49,454 --> 00:40:51,127
asking for the answers,
697
00:40:51,289 --> 00:40:53,895
And all you ever gave me were toys.
698
00:40:55,327 --> 00:40:59,469
This Christmas, I will
have my Christmas wish!
699
00:40:59,631 --> 00:41:03,044
I will give the secrets
of your sleigh to my mother,
700
00:41:03,235 --> 00:41:06,944
and Quickest Airborne Delivery
will be, at last,
701
00:41:07,105 --> 00:41:12,521
the fastest delivery service on Earth!
702
00:41:12,678 --> 00:41:15,420
(RADIO SQUAWKING)
703
00:41:15,580 --> 00:41:19,323
Neville! Pick up, you
moon-faced feather-brain!
704
00:41:19,484 --> 00:41:23,125
Excuse me, I have a business, uh...
705
00:41:23,288 --> 00:41:27,031
A foreign dignitary client
important person.
706
00:41:27,192 --> 00:41:29,138
- That needs my...
- Neville!
707
00:41:31,163 --> 00:41:34,440
Pick up the radio,
you dunder-headed dolt!
708
00:41:34,599 --> 00:41:36,476
Oh, hello, Mommy.
709
00:41:36,635 --> 00:41:38,114
Good news.
710
00:41:38,270 --> 00:41:40,807
I found Santa's workshop.
711
00:41:41,707 --> 00:41:44,085
Have you, now?
712
00:41:44,276 --> 00:41:46,381
(BERNARD WHISPERING) Santa!
713
00:41:47,446 --> 00:41:50,222
Santa, it's me, Bernard.
714
00:41:50,382 --> 00:41:54,353
Bernard! (CHUCKLES)
Clever disguise.
715
00:41:54,519 --> 00:41:56,658
Do you think you can
get us out of here?
716
00:41:56,822 --> 00:41:59,200
He's after the Time Globe.
717
00:41:59,357 --> 00:42:00,495
I have a better idea.
718
00:42:00,659 --> 00:42:02,536
I think I know a way to stop him,
719
00:42:02,694 --> 00:42:04,214
but I'm gonna have to go back in time.
720
00:42:04,362 --> 00:42:05,864
Again.
721
00:42:06,031 --> 00:42:08,033
Bernard! Be careful!
722
00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:10,840
I told you.
You can't undo the past.
723
00:42:11,002 --> 00:42:13,414
- Only add to it.
- I have to try.
724
00:42:13,572 --> 00:42:16,348
If I can stop myself from making
it to the presentation, I can...
725
00:42:16,508 --> 00:42:17,816
Who are you talking to?
726
00:42:18,744 --> 00:42:19,848
Ow!
727
00:42:20,011 --> 00:42:21,012
I see with that thing!
728
00:42:21,179 --> 00:42:22,522
- How do you like it?
- Ow!
729
00:42:22,681 --> 00:42:23,819
I... Little...
730
00:42:23,982 --> 00:42:25,825
(ALL SHOUTING) Come here, you!
731
00:42:25,984 --> 00:42:27,088
Gotcha!
732
00:42:31,056 --> 00:42:33,002
(SIGHS)
733
00:42:35,927 --> 00:42:37,770
Great. Dead end.
734
00:42:38,997 --> 00:42:40,442
(DOLL SQUEAKS)
735
00:42:40,599 --> 00:42:42,044
(GUN BEEPS)
736
00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:43,770
(SAGS)
737
00:42:43,935 --> 00:42:45,710
Come out, little elf.
738
00:42:45,871 --> 00:42:47,544
There's nowhere to run.
739
00:42:47,706 --> 00:42:49,014
And you wouldn't get very far
740
00:42:49,174 --> 00:42:52,053
on those stubby little legs of yours.
741
00:42:56,248 --> 00:42:59,457
Ah. Don't mind if I do.
742
00:43:01,853 --> 00:43:04,163
(ENGINE ROARS)
What's that sound?
743
00:43:05,223 --> 00:43:06,793
(HORN TOOTS)
744
00:43:08,093 --> 00:43:09,470
I'm going back, Santa!
745
00:43:09,628 --> 00:43:11,028
If I can destroy the memory device,
746
00:43:11,129 --> 00:43:13,200
I can stop the presentation!
747
00:43:13,365 --> 00:43:14,867
Good luck, Bernard!
748
00:43:15,033 --> 00:43:17,240
(GRUNTS) Don't move, Beardy.
749
00:43:17,402 --> 00:43:19,211
(EXCLAIMING)
750
00:43:21,606 --> 00:43:23,085
(TIRES SCREECHING)
751
00:43:24,309 --> 00:43:25,549
(GIGGLING)
752
00:43:30,849 --> 00:43:32,453
Get that elf!
753
00:43:34,052 --> 00:43:36,123
(BOTH YELL)
(GASPS)
754
00:43:45,797 --> 00:43:46,969
(GASPS)
755
00:43:54,406 --> 00:43:55,441
(YELLING)
756
00:44:01,580 --> 00:44:03,821
Snow long!
(CHUCKLING)
757
00:44:05,217 --> 00:44:06,594
(YELLING)
758
00:44:08,320 --> 00:44:09,594
They're coming!
759
00:44:10,856 --> 00:44:12,529
(YELLING) Come here!
760
00:44:15,126 --> 00:44:16,503
- Move it in!
- Here, here!
761
00:44:16,661 --> 00:44:19,505
- Go, go, go!
- Yes!
762
00:44:22,634 --> 00:44:25,240
Come on, Bernard,
just a few more seconds!
763
00:44:25,437 --> 00:44:27,713
(ISSUING COMMAND)
764
00:44:27,873 --> 00:44:28,977
(GRUNTING)
765
00:44:30,675 --> 00:44:32,712
Deck the halls, I made it!
766
00:44:34,546 --> 00:44:36,787
(YELLING)
767
00:44:38,516 --> 00:44:40,359
(GRUNTS)
768
00:44:41,319 --> 00:44:43,356
What did you do that for?
769
00:44:43,521 --> 00:44:44,864
MAN: He's activated the sleigh!
770
00:44:47,158 --> 00:44:49,661
OTHER BERNARD: I have?
How did I do that?
771
00:44:50,695 --> 00:44:51,696
(YELPS)
772
00:44:51,863 --> 00:44:53,570
- Get it!
- Follow me!
773
00:44:53,732 --> 00:44:56,508
(ALL CLAMORING)
774
00:44:57,535 --> 00:44:58,673
(YELLING)
775
00:45:12,317 --> 00:45:17,426
Oh, my whole life and I had to
repeat this day three times.
776
00:45:19,691 --> 00:45:21,500
(WHISPERING) Watch out for the...
(SQUISH)
777
00:45:21,660 --> 00:45:25,198
Oh, come on, I just
cleaned up in here.
778
00:45:25,363 --> 00:45:28,003
Well, duh,
you went back in time.
779
00:45:38,543 --> 00:45:41,524
(SNORING LOUDLY)
780
00:45:56,594 --> 00:45:58,733
Nah, too loud.
781
00:45:59,798 --> 00:46:01,778
(ALARM CLANGING)
782
00:46:01,933 --> 00:46:04,243
OTHER BERNARD: What are you doing here?
783
00:46:06,471 --> 00:46:10,146
I expressly ordered
nine ladies dancing.
784
00:46:14,279 --> 00:46:15,587
(RESUMES SNORING)
785
00:46:36,334 --> 00:46:38,974
(GASPS) I told you.
786
00:46:39,137 --> 00:46:42,778
You're looking at the world's
first time-traveling elf.
787
00:46:46,077 --> 00:46:48,785
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
788
00:46:52,984 --> 00:46:54,861
Excuse you!
789
00:46:55,020 --> 00:46:57,159
You don't eat it, you just...
790
00:47:07,599 --> 00:47:09,272
(EXCLAIMING)
(THUMP)
791
00:47:09,434 --> 00:47:12,278
(SLEEPY MUTTERING)
792
00:47:22,113 --> 00:47:23,558
Oh no!
793
00:47:23,715 --> 00:47:26,195
Mint chocolate cookies,
I slept in!
794
00:47:26,351 --> 00:47:28,228
Not today, not today!
795
00:47:28,386 --> 00:47:30,525
Oh, where the blinking...?
796
00:47:30,688 --> 00:47:32,224
Ah, there you are.
(GASPS)
797
00:47:36,027 --> 00:47:38,837
Oh, now I'll never stop
the presentation!
798
00:47:40,065 --> 00:47:41,066
(ALL EXCLAIMING)
799
00:47:41,232 --> 00:47:43,303
(GASPS) No pants!
800
00:47:43,435 --> 00:47:45,142
No pants!
801
00:48:00,585 --> 00:48:01,655
(YELPS)
802
00:48:03,888 --> 00:48:05,026
(GASPS)
803
00:48:07,892 --> 00:48:09,371
- Huh?
- Huh?
804
00:48:11,429 --> 00:48:13,102
(PANTING)
805
00:48:16,201 --> 00:48:17,737
I've got a presentation to stop.
806
00:48:20,171 --> 00:48:22,344
If I could just get there first!
807
00:48:28,413 --> 00:48:30,393
Ooh, this is gonna sting!
808
00:48:33,685 --> 00:48:35,562
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWS)
Wait! Wait up!
809
00:48:38,690 --> 00:48:40,931
Wait up!
Hold the train!
810
00:48:41,793 --> 00:48:42,999
Ooh!
811
00:49:00,545 --> 00:49:02,149
Oh, sorry!
812
00:49:07,819 --> 00:49:09,992
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
813
00:49:15,493 --> 00:49:16,563
(GASPS)
814
00:49:22,967 --> 00:49:24,139
(GRUNTS)
815
00:49:26,471 --> 00:49:28,246
That way!
816
00:49:33,745 --> 00:49:35,656
Ooh!
817
00:49:38,183 --> 00:49:40,129
Morning, Blitz!
818
00:49:46,591 --> 00:49:49,834
(BERNARD GROANS) Ow!
819
00:49:49,994 --> 00:49:51,837
(INQUISITIVE GIBBERISH)
820
00:49:53,097 --> 00:49:55,043
How long have I been out?
821
00:49:57,769 --> 00:50:00,215
Oh, great! It happened again!
822
00:50:00,371 --> 00:50:02,851
Ow! What'd you do that for, anyway?
823
00:50:03,007 --> 00:50:05,044
Jumping on me like that.
Have you lost your mind?
824
00:50:05,210 --> 00:50:06,689
(GIBBERISH)
825
00:50:06,844 --> 00:50:08,517
(LAUGHS) Me?
826
00:50:08,680 --> 00:50:12,025
It was my fault?
You are ridiculous.
827
00:50:12,183 --> 00:50:15,027
BERNARD 2: Listen,
you have to find the other me.
828
00:50:15,186 --> 00:50:18,065
Stop me and get me to listen
to you, no matter what!
829
00:50:18,223 --> 00:50:19,702
It was my fault.
830
00:50:19,857 --> 00:50:23,566
You just got the wrong "me."
(SIGHS)
831
00:50:23,728 --> 00:50:26,470
What's the point of
having a time machine
832
00:50:26,631 --> 00:50:29,271
if you can't go back and
prevent things from happening?
833
00:50:29,467 --> 00:50:30,673
(POWER GRID HUMMING)
834
00:50:30,835 --> 00:50:32,872
Hah! There are the lights!
835
00:50:33,037 --> 00:50:35,745
Brilliant! Disaster
is right on schedule!
836
00:50:35,907 --> 00:50:39,411
(SIGHS)
(INQUISITIVE GIBBERISH)
837
00:50:41,379 --> 00:50:44,258
Oh, just leave me alone, would you?
838
00:50:45,550 --> 00:50:47,154
You should stay away.
839
00:50:47,318 --> 00:50:48,888
As far away from me as possible,
840
00:50:49,053 --> 00:50:50,657
if you know what's good for you.
841
00:50:53,024 --> 00:50:54,435
Just go back to the stables
842
00:50:54,592 --> 00:50:56,970
before I mess everything
up for you, too.
843
00:50:58,162 --> 00:51:00,768
Can't you see what
a muck-up I am?
844
00:51:02,934 --> 00:51:05,778
Go... Go on, Blitz.
Go on, will you?
845
00:51:05,937 --> 00:51:08,076
Go!
846
00:51:15,580 --> 00:51:19,551
MAN: Santech is only for
the greatest elf minds, not...
847
00:51:19,717 --> 00:51:23,130
(INHALES)
...reindeer poop-scoopers.
848
00:51:25,556 --> 00:51:27,968
Could this day get any worse?
849
00:51:28,126 --> 00:51:29,571
(ZAPPING)
BERNARD 1: Ow!
850
00:51:31,596 --> 00:51:33,473
(BERNARD 1 GRUNTS)
851
00:51:37,468 --> 00:51:40,039
SNOWY: Wake up, Bernard!
852
00:51:40,738 --> 00:51:42,081
(GASPS)
853
00:51:42,240 --> 00:51:45,312
(GRUNTING)
854
00:51:45,476 --> 00:51:47,547
Thought you could get away, did you?
855
00:51:47,712 --> 00:51:51,159
Well, Bernard, if you
are indeed innocent,
856
00:51:51,316 --> 00:51:53,227
how do you explain this?
857
00:51:53,384 --> 00:51:56,388
Huh? We found this outside Santech.
858
00:51:56,521 --> 00:51:58,797
We believe that you intentionally
caused the blackout
859
00:51:58,956 --> 00:52:00,902
that disabled the cloaking hologram!
860
00:52:01,059 --> 00:52:05,508
(SIGHS) I'm not the one you
should be worried about.
861
00:52:05,663 --> 00:52:10,635
Neville Baddington. He's the one
you should be worried about.
862
00:52:10,802 --> 00:52:13,146
- Who's that?
- Neville Baddington.
863
00:52:13,304 --> 00:52:15,477
Height: six foot one.
864
00:52:15,640 --> 00:52:17,244
Weight: blah, blah, blah.
865
00:52:17,408 --> 00:52:19,251
Oh, here we go!
866
00:52:19,410 --> 00:52:23,017
Heir to the Quickest
Airborne Delivery empire.
867
00:52:23,181 --> 00:52:26,253
(FANFARE PLAYS)
868
00:52:26,417 --> 00:52:28,328
WOMAN ON SCREEN: Globe-trotting millionaire
869
00:52:28,486 --> 00:52:30,295
and all-around eccentric heir
870
00:52:30,455 --> 00:52:32,526
to the Quickest Airborne
delivery service,
871
00:52:32,690 --> 00:52:36,035
Neville Baddington claims
"I can find Santa Claus."
872
00:52:36,194 --> 00:52:38,061
(SIGHS)
WOMAN: You heard it right, folks.
873
00:52:38,062 --> 00:52:40,508
This particular purveyor of parcels
874
00:52:40,665 --> 00:52:44,203
looks to unlock the secrets
of Santa's speedy sleigh.
875
00:52:44,369 --> 00:52:46,940
NEVILLE ON SCREEN: I've been
documenting him for years.
876
00:52:47,105 --> 00:52:51,645
I have photographic proof
here, here and here.
877
00:52:51,809 --> 00:52:53,846
- Hmm?
- That's him.
878
00:52:54,011 --> 00:52:55,684
He wants to learn how Santa
879
00:52:55,847 --> 00:52:58,691
travels round the world
in one night
880
00:52:58,850 --> 00:53:01,194
(BUZZING)
- (GASPS)
881
00:53:02,487 --> 00:53:04,967
Sir! I think we've got a blip!
882
00:53:05,123 --> 00:53:06,500
A blip?
883
00:53:06,657 --> 00:53:08,864
Uh, I think it looks
more like a blop.
884
00:53:10,728 --> 00:53:13,800
NEVILLE: Oh, of course!
Silly-billy me.
885
00:53:13,965 --> 00:53:18,380
Clearly, there is nothing there.
I mean, any rational person
886
00:53:18,536 --> 00:53:20,516
would see that there
is nothing beneath us
887
00:53:20,671 --> 00:53:23,379
but a bunch of mountains and snow.
888
00:53:23,541 --> 00:53:27,512
And not a clever facade
masking Santa's workshop.
889
00:53:27,678 --> 00:53:30,852
Surely not.
Only a madman would think
890
00:53:31,015 --> 00:53:35,862
we will surely crash and explode
into fiery bits and pieces
891
00:53:36,020 --> 00:53:39,160
if we flew straight down...
892
00:53:40,892 --> 00:53:42,872
(YELLING)
893
00:53:55,373 --> 00:53:58,252
(KLAXON SOUNDING)
894
00:53:58,409 --> 00:54:00,787
Sir, someone has
breached the hologram!
895
00:54:00,945 --> 00:54:02,549
Put it onscreen.
896
00:54:04,549 --> 00:54:06,529
It's an invasion.
897
00:54:06,684 --> 00:54:07,685
Everybody panic!
898
00:54:07,852 --> 00:54:09,957
Don't we have a plan for this?
899
00:54:10,121 --> 00:54:12,431
For an invasion of the North Pole?
900
00:54:12,590 --> 00:54:14,297
Who plans for that?
901
00:54:14,459 --> 00:54:16,530
- Run!
- Hide!
902
00:54:16,661 --> 00:54:19,141
(ALL YELLING)
Out of my way! Out of my way!
903
00:54:20,364 --> 00:54:22,435
Bernard! You must know some way
904
00:54:22,600 --> 00:54:23,908
we can stop Neville Baddington.
905
00:54:24,068 --> 00:54:25,979
You can't.
I've tried everything!
906
00:54:26,137 --> 00:54:28,208
Three times!
907
00:54:28,372 --> 00:54:30,318
What's gotten into you?
908
00:54:30,475 --> 00:54:32,819
Earlier, you were so
desperate to save Santa.
909
00:54:32,977 --> 00:54:34,786
And now you just don't care?
910
00:54:34,946 --> 00:54:37,483
I've failed.
There's nothing I can do.
911
00:54:37,648 --> 00:54:40,925
He's going to invade.
(GASPS)
912
00:54:41,085 --> 00:54:43,588
I'm sorry.
It's like Santa said,
913
00:54:43,754 --> 00:54:46,667
once something is done,
it can't be undone.
914
00:54:46,824 --> 00:54:49,304
(SIGHS)
915
00:54:53,264 --> 00:54:54,504
I'm no hero.
916
00:54:54,665 --> 00:54:57,145
I'm just a poop-scooper.
917
00:54:57,301 --> 00:54:58,803
♪ Say you've got another shot
918
00:54:58,970 --> 00:55:00,643
♪ At saving Christmas Eve in you
919
00:55:00,805 --> 00:55:04,184
♪ These other elves
They don't know where to turn
920
00:55:04,342 --> 00:55:06,083
♪ Take a good long look at me
921
00:55:06,244 --> 00:55:08,087
♪ 'Cause somehow
I believe in you
922
00:55:08,246 --> 00:55:11,420
♪ That kind of elf belief
you have to earn
923
00:55:11,549 --> 00:55:13,324
♪ So stop and think
924
00:55:13,484 --> 00:55:15,486
♪ 'Cause you know what's in store
925
00:55:15,653 --> 00:55:16,961
♪ An elf with that much vision
926
00:55:17,121 --> 00:55:18,998
♪ Is an elf we're fighting for
927
00:55:19,156 --> 00:55:22,603
♪ But before I do
the big hard sell for you
928
00:55:22,760 --> 00:55:26,708
♪ I need to know
what kind of elf are you
929
00:55:26,864 --> 00:55:30,334
♪ Sink or swim
Do or die
930
00:55:30,501 --> 00:55:33,675
♪ Make this stand
Or stand by
931
00:55:33,838 --> 00:55:37,251
♪ When everyone around you
wants to run and hide
932
00:55:37,441 --> 00:55:39,387
♪ It's time to decide
933
00:55:39,544 --> 00:55:42,923
♪ What kind of elf
you want to be
934
00:55:43,114 --> 00:55:44,684
♪ You've got brains
I know you have
935
00:55:44,849 --> 00:55:46,658
♪ You've brains enough
for two in there
936
00:55:46,817 --> 00:55:50,060
♪ So come up with a
plan to save the day
937
00:55:50,221 --> 00:55:52,030
♪ Think back over everything
938
00:55:52,189 --> 00:55:53,896
♪ There has to be
a clue in there
939
00:55:54,058 --> 00:55:57,403
♪ You find it and we're
with you all the way
940
00:55:57,562 --> 00:56:01,032
♪ So stop and think of
the children big and small
941
00:56:01,198 --> 00:56:02,700
♪ 'Cause a Christmas
without Santa
942
00:56:02,867 --> 00:56:04,869
♪ Doesn't sound much fun at all
943
00:56:05,036 --> 00:56:08,381
♪ Sink or swim
Do or die
944
00:56:08,539 --> 00:56:11,816
♪ Worth a shot
Worth a try
945
00:56:11,976 --> 00:56:15,355
♪ When everyone around you
wants to run and hide
946
00:56:15,513 --> 00:56:18,756
♪ It's time to decide
What kind of elf...
947
00:56:18,916 --> 00:56:22,261
♪ Look, if you say
that you trust me
948
00:56:22,420 --> 00:56:25,697
♪ Then, OK
I'll trust you too
949
00:56:25,856 --> 00:56:28,132
- ♪ As long as children
- ♪ As long as children
950
00:56:28,326 --> 00:56:29,566
- ♪ Believe in Santa
- ♪ Believe
951
00:56:29,694 --> 00:56:34,074
♪ Then I won't give up on you
952
00:56:40,404 --> 00:56:43,749
WOMAN ON SCREEN: Is it true
your mother is the real CEO of QAD?
953
00:56:43,908 --> 00:56:46,184
Excellent question.
Let me think.
954
00:56:46,344 --> 00:56:49,882
Get over here, you pesky,
little good-for-nothing!
955
00:56:50,047 --> 00:56:53,085
WOMAN: Well, someone seems to
have lost their Christmas spirit.
956
00:56:53,250 --> 00:56:55,127
Holy eggnog, that's it!
957
00:56:55,286 --> 00:56:57,562
He has Christmas spirit.
958
00:56:57,722 --> 00:57:00,896
But it's lost in his brain!
959
00:57:01,058 --> 00:57:03,971
- Oh.
- I know how to stop Neville.
960
00:57:04,128 --> 00:57:05,449
(PEOPLE CLAMORING) Quiet down!
961
00:57:05,563 --> 00:57:07,236
Calm down, everyone.
I've got it!
962
00:57:07,398 --> 00:57:11,244
This memory machine caused it,
and it can end it.
963
00:57:11,402 --> 00:57:13,075
But I need help fixing it.
964
00:57:13,237 --> 00:57:14,238
Who's with me?
965
00:57:15,706 --> 00:57:18,050
(GASPING)
(EXCLAIMING)
966
00:57:18,209 --> 00:57:20,211
- ♪ So stop
- Stop!
967
00:57:20,378 --> 00:57:22,415
♪ I can put this right
I swear to you
968
00:57:22,580 --> 00:57:25,459
♪ I'll have the big man
flying high tonight
969
00:57:25,616 --> 00:57:28,995
♪ Sink or swim
Do or die
970
00:57:29,153 --> 00:57:32,498
♪ Rally round or say goodbye
971
00:57:32,657 --> 00:57:35,661
♪ Each one of you's a hero
if you only knew
972
00:57:35,826 --> 00:57:37,362
♪ So who's on my crew?
973
00:57:37,561 --> 00:57:39,438
♪ I need you and
you and you and you
974
00:57:39,597 --> 00:57:42,942
♪ Sink or swim
Do or die
975
00:57:43,100 --> 00:57:46,411
♪ Whata team
You and you and you and I
976
00:57:46,570 --> 00:57:49,608
♪ When everyone around you
wants to run and hide
977
00:57:49,774 --> 00:57:51,720
♪ It's time to decide
978
00:57:51,909 --> 00:57:56,016
♪ What kind of elf
you want to be
979
00:57:56,180 --> 00:57:58,387
♪ Are you an oaf like that?
980
00:57:59,917 --> 00:58:04,297
♪ Or an elf like me? ♪
981
00:58:12,797 --> 00:58:16,006
(PEOPLE SHOUTING)
982
00:58:19,804 --> 00:58:23,013
BERNARD: Quickly! We have to get
to the sleigh before Neville does.
983
00:58:33,384 --> 00:58:34,863
The coast is clear.
984
00:58:35,019 --> 00:58:36,498
Move!
985
00:58:41,826 --> 00:58:44,033
Secure the front door.
Go, go, go!
986
00:58:47,531 --> 00:58:49,408
Hurry everyone!
Blend in!
987
00:58:49,567 --> 00:58:51,706
MAN: Nothing here.
988
00:59:01,178 --> 00:59:02,885
(GASPS) Here he comes.
989
00:59:03,047 --> 00:59:04,617
MAN: You two,
stop right where you are!
990
00:59:04,815 --> 00:59:06,761
Nobody move!
991
00:59:06,917 --> 00:59:08,794
(EXCLAIMS)
992
00:59:10,154 --> 00:59:13,567
Pucker up, lass.
(CHUCKLES)
993
00:59:13,724 --> 00:59:15,931
(GIGGLES) Shh!
994
00:59:17,895 --> 00:59:21,604
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
995
00:59:28,105 --> 00:59:30,711
MAN: Run this way, you two!
Now, now, now!
996
00:59:32,243 --> 00:59:34,189
(CACKLING)
997
00:59:34,345 --> 00:59:36,450
Oh, it wouldn't be Christmas
998
00:59:36,614 --> 00:59:40,460
without complete chaos
and utter panic.
999
00:59:40,618 --> 00:59:43,929
(INHALES DEEPLY)
Do you smell that?
1000
00:59:44,088 --> 00:59:46,193
I don't think this is going to work.
1001
00:59:46,357 --> 00:59:47,700
There's too many of them.
1002
00:59:47,825 --> 00:59:50,032
And, frankly, too many of me.
1003
00:59:50,194 --> 00:59:54,574
You're right. The only way around this
is to jump from the roof.
1004
00:59:54,732 --> 00:59:58,077
Really?
The only way?
1005
00:59:58,235 --> 01:00:00,715
No way. No roof!
1006
01:00:00,871 --> 01:00:02,043
(GRUNTING)
1007
01:00:02,173 --> 01:00:05,086
No! I'm a delicate snowflake.
1008
01:00:06,310 --> 01:00:08,119
- Hey!
- Sorry!
1009
01:00:08,279 --> 01:00:10,589
NEVILLE: I want to know
how a man that big
1010
01:00:10,748 --> 01:00:13,285
gets around the world
in one night!
1011
01:00:13,450 --> 01:00:15,930
Find that sleigh!
1012
01:00:16,086 --> 01:00:18,225
MAN: Let's start in the Pancake Palace.
1013
01:00:18,389 --> 01:00:19,766
MAN 2: Good call.
(SNEEZES)
1014
01:00:19,924 --> 01:00:21,904
(GASPS)
1015
01:00:30,267 --> 01:00:31,302
(GASPS)
1016
01:00:41,612 --> 01:00:44,593
- Why, you little...
MAN: - Yeah! Where's the sleigh?
1017
01:00:44,715 --> 01:00:47,753
SANTA: You two are not
being very good this year.
1018
01:00:47,885 --> 01:00:49,831
(GROANS)
1019
01:00:51,589 --> 01:00:54,035
Santa! (GRUNTING)
1020
01:01:05,202 --> 01:01:07,045
(BERNARD STAMMERING)
That really is high.
1021
01:01:07,204 --> 01:01:09,707
Step aside, please.
1022
01:01:14,278 --> 01:01:15,518
Hmm...
1023
01:01:15,679 --> 01:01:18,353
(WHIRRING, BEEPING)
There we go.
1024
01:01:26,490 --> 01:01:28,128
How much do you weigh?
1025
01:01:28,292 --> 01:01:33,207
Fifty... Uh, forty-two...
one... ish.
1026
01:01:33,364 --> 01:01:34,843
That should hold.
1027
01:01:34,999 --> 01:01:36,979
Probably.
1028
01:01:43,507 --> 01:01:45,817
OK, let's do this!
1029
01:01:45,976 --> 01:01:47,580
(YELLING)
1030
01:01:47,745 --> 01:01:50,658
(♪ ASHLEY TISDALE: "SOME KIND OF MIRACLE")
1031
01:01:50,814 --> 01:01:52,384
Ha-ha! Whoo-hoo!
1032
01:01:58,889 --> 01:02:00,891
No, not now!
1033
01:02:03,394 --> 01:02:05,897
(YELLING)
(GASPS)
1034
01:02:09,967 --> 01:02:12,038
(GRUNTS)
1035
01:02:12,202 --> 01:02:13,840
Oh, poo!
1036
01:02:19,510 --> 01:02:23,686
(ALL GRUNTING)
1037
01:02:24,782 --> 01:02:26,784
(EXCLAIMS)
1038
01:02:30,354 --> 01:02:31,856
(GASPS)
1039
01:02:34,091 --> 01:02:35,434
(YELLING)
1040
01:02:45,369 --> 01:02:47,280
Hold on, I've got you!
1041
01:02:51,208 --> 01:02:54,746
- Good luck!
- Thanks!
1042
01:02:54,912 --> 01:02:56,482
(ALL GROANING)
1043
01:02:56,647 --> 01:03:00,094
Are you sure
he's just a poo-shoveler?
1044
01:03:00,250 --> 01:03:02,730
(EXCLAIMING)
1045
01:03:05,656 --> 01:03:08,535
How do I stop this thing?
(YELLING)
1046
01:03:08,726 --> 01:03:10,137
Ooh!
(DOOR RATTLES)
1047
01:03:12,896 --> 01:03:15,206
(GRUNTING GROANING)
1048
01:03:15,399 --> 01:03:16,901
I guess that was the only way.
1049
01:03:17,067 --> 01:03:18,444
MAN: Follow me!
(GASPS)
1050
01:03:18,602 --> 01:03:20,138
Right here!
1051
01:03:22,272 --> 01:03:24,878
(CAR APPROACHING)
1052
01:03:26,677 --> 01:03:28,679
(YELPS)
1053
01:03:31,015 --> 01:03:34,656
A fine time to have a chat.
You want to help, maybe?
1054
01:03:36,687 --> 01:03:38,291
(TIRES SCREECH)
(DOOR THUMPS)
1055
01:03:38,455 --> 01:03:40,332
BERNARD 1: They're coming!
1056
01:03:40,491 --> 01:03:42,971
Oh, I just wish I had time to think.
1057
01:03:43,127 --> 01:03:45,937
I just wish I had time.
1058
01:03:46,096 --> 01:03:47,131
(BLIXEN SPEAKS GIBBERISH)
1059
01:03:47,297 --> 01:03:49,334
Not now, I'm thinking.
1060
01:03:53,871 --> 01:03:57,148
(GRUNTS) More time.
1061
01:03:58,876 --> 01:04:00,822
The Time Globe.
1062
01:04:00,978 --> 01:04:04,289
I could go back and warn Santa.
1063
01:04:04,415 --> 01:04:06,292
Blitz, you're a genius!
1064
01:04:09,153 --> 01:04:11,113
(GROANS)
BERNARD 1: Were you eating pancakes?
1065
01:04:11,288 --> 01:04:12,631
(GRUNTING)
1066
01:04:12,790 --> 01:04:14,235
- Move it in!
- They're here!
1067
01:04:14,391 --> 01:04:15,768
Go, go, go!
1068
01:04:15,959 --> 01:04:17,563
BERNARD 1: Oh, where the elf is it?
1069
01:04:18,662 --> 01:04:21,165
Spread out.
You check that side.
1070
01:04:22,032 --> 01:04:24,012
We're clear!
1071
01:04:29,807 --> 01:04:31,047
Yes!
1072
01:04:32,709 --> 01:04:34,655
- There!
- Get him!
1073
01:04:42,920 --> 01:04:45,366
(ISSUES COMMAND)
1074
01:04:45,522 --> 01:04:47,399
(GRUNTING)
1075
01:04:49,893 --> 01:04:51,497
(GRUNTS)
1076
01:04:57,801 --> 01:04:59,838
(YELLING)
1077
01:05:00,003 --> 01:05:02,108
(YELLING)
1078
01:05:03,273 --> 01:05:04,752
(EXCLAIMS)
1079
01:05:12,749 --> 01:05:15,389
What did you do that for?
1080
01:05:15,552 --> 01:05:17,429
MAN: He's activated the sleigh!
1081
01:05:22,893 --> 01:05:25,533
- Get it!
- Follow me!
1082
01:05:25,696 --> 01:05:29,143
Don't move!
(BOTH SCREAMING)
1083
01:05:43,981 --> 01:05:45,756
(ALL GROANING)
1084
01:05:53,323 --> 01:05:54,631
What is this?
1085
01:05:54,791 --> 01:05:56,293
I turn my back for two seconds
1086
01:05:56,460 --> 01:05:58,633
and you're having a little nap.
1087
01:05:58,795 --> 01:06:01,639
Hey! Stop that elf!
1088
01:06:03,800 --> 01:06:04,938
You!
1089
01:06:07,337 --> 01:06:10,944
Yes, you, you tick-infested nitwit.
1090
01:06:11,108 --> 01:06:13,179
Pull the sleigh outside.
1091
01:06:13,343 --> 01:06:16,984
I want everybody to see my triumph!
1092
01:06:25,455 --> 01:06:28,129
(ALL GASPING)
1093
01:06:31,929 --> 01:06:33,806
NEVILLE: Witness, all of you!
1094
01:06:33,964 --> 01:06:37,138
Santa's sleigh and all its secrets,
1095
01:06:37,301 --> 01:06:39,713
beneath my icy boots.
1096
01:06:39,870 --> 01:06:42,180
Neville Baddington.
1097
01:06:42,339 --> 01:06:45,377
CEO and majority stockholder
1098
01:06:45,542 --> 01:06:48,045
in the world's soon-to-be-biggest...
1099
01:06:48,212 --> 01:06:53,127
Nay, only package delivery
mega corporation!
1100
01:06:53,283 --> 01:06:55,627
You can almost hear the "whoosh"
1101
01:06:55,786 --> 01:06:58,460
of packages whizzing around the world
1102
01:06:58,622 --> 01:07:04,197
at the speed of Santa, 365 days a year!
1103
01:07:04,361 --> 01:07:06,466
Hah!
1104
01:07:06,630 --> 01:07:12,478
And mother, if her tear ducts do,
in fact, exist,
1105
01:07:12,636 --> 01:07:15,742
tears of pride will stream down
1106
01:07:15,906 --> 01:07:18,819
her sweet, prunish cheeks,
1107
01:07:18,976 --> 01:07:23,118
as she embraces me with
her jagged, bony frame.
1108
01:07:23,313 --> 01:07:27,022
"Good job, Neville," she'll whisper.
1109
01:07:28,185 --> 01:07:30,688
As of this moment,
1110
01:07:30,854 --> 01:07:34,927
Christmas is outsourced!
1111
01:07:44,101 --> 01:07:45,444
"Dear Neville,
1112
01:07:45,602 --> 01:07:47,047
what I want for Christmas
1113
01:07:47,204 --> 01:07:49,741
is to be able to go back in time
1114
01:07:49,906 --> 01:07:52,512
and tell you the secrets
of the North Pole.
1115
01:07:52,676 --> 01:07:54,883
Love, Santa."
1116
01:07:55,045 --> 01:07:57,457
"Dear, Santa,
1117
01:07:57,614 --> 01:07:59,457
Too late!"
1118
01:08:02,352 --> 01:08:04,798
BERNARD: Actually, it's not too late.
1119
01:08:05,789 --> 01:08:06,927
Who said that?
1120
01:08:07,090 --> 01:08:08,728
BERNARD: Me, sir.
1121
01:08:10,560 --> 01:08:11,732
And you are...?
1122
01:08:11,895 --> 01:08:14,273
I'm... I'm the, um...
1123
01:08:14,431 --> 01:08:16,377
...chief inventor for Santech.
1124
01:08:16,500 --> 01:08:18,309
(CLEARING THROAT)
1125
01:08:19,536 --> 01:08:20,981
Put him down.
1126
01:08:21,672 --> 01:08:23,879
(GRUNTS, GROANS)
1127
01:08:24,041 --> 01:08:26,282
Chief inventor, are we?
1128
01:08:26,443 --> 01:08:30,152
Then you are familiar with
the secrets of this sleigh?
1129
01:08:30,314 --> 01:08:33,989
Yes, sir.
If I promised to show you...
1130
01:08:34,151 --> 01:08:35,926
Huh?
1131
01:08:36,086 --> 01:08:37,759
...would you release Santa?
1132
01:08:39,122 --> 01:08:41,602
I would be inclined.
1133
01:08:41,758 --> 01:08:43,635
Uh, may I?
1134
01:08:51,335 --> 01:08:53,144
(GRUNTING)
1135
01:08:53,303 --> 01:08:55,840
A little help, please?
I'm vertically challenged.
1136
01:08:58,508 --> 01:09:00,181
Oh!
1137
01:09:02,512 --> 01:09:04,685
The question on everybody's mind,
1138
01:09:04,848 --> 01:09:06,521
on your mind, your whole life,
1139
01:09:06,683 --> 01:09:09,163
was "How does he do it?"
How does one man
1140
01:09:09,319 --> 01:09:11,321
make it around the entire
world in one night?
1141
01:09:11,488 --> 01:09:13,092
Especially for someone like you,
1142
01:09:13,256 --> 01:09:15,497
who delivers packages all year round.
1143
01:09:15,659 --> 01:09:17,536
The answer?
1144
01:09:19,963 --> 01:09:21,442
Time travel!
1145
01:09:21,598 --> 01:09:23,475
(ALL GASPING) Time travel?
1146
01:09:23,633 --> 01:09:24,941
Time travel?
1147
01:09:25,102 --> 01:09:28,174
This is more fascinating
than I thought.
1148
01:09:28,338 --> 01:09:30,181
Mother will be pleased.
1149
01:09:30,340 --> 01:09:32,445
But... there are rules.
1150
01:09:32,609 --> 01:09:36,648
Do I look like someone who
concerns himself with rules?
1151
01:09:36,813 --> 01:09:39,453
Then let's skip those and get
to the good stuff, shall we?
1152
01:09:39,616 --> 01:09:41,459
I'm gonna need a volunteer.
1153
01:09:41,618 --> 01:09:43,962
- Me! Me!
- You're fired.
1154
01:09:44,121 --> 01:09:45,156
Aww.
1155
01:09:45,322 --> 01:09:46,733
Me! Me!
1156
01:09:46,890 --> 01:09:50,428
- You?
- Oh, yes please.
1157
01:09:50,627 --> 01:09:55,076
OK, Neville, I'm just gonna need
you to place your hand here.
1158
01:09:55,232 --> 01:09:58,372
Then... hope for
a Christmas miracle.
1159
01:10:03,073 --> 01:10:04,848
Oooh...
1160
01:10:05,008 --> 01:10:07,045
Feels time-travel-y.
1161
01:10:07,210 --> 01:10:08,712
Hold on.
1162
01:10:13,517 --> 01:10:15,360
That's my old home.
1163
01:10:16,520 --> 01:10:19,831
That's me.
As a young boy.
1164
01:10:22,526 --> 01:10:25,598
YOUNG NEVILLE: Dear, Santa.
1165
01:10:25,762 --> 01:10:29,539
♪ I have a secret Christmas wish
1166
01:10:29,699 --> 01:10:32,543
♪ I know you know it well
1167
01:10:32,702 --> 01:10:36,240
♪ It's something
that! want so much
1168
01:10:36,406 --> 01:10:39,114
♪ I cannot even tell
1169
01:10:39,276 --> 01:10:43,190
♪ If I believe with all my heart
1170
01:10:43,313 --> 01:10:46,419
♪ I know it can come true
1171
01:10:46,583 --> 01:10:50,895
♪ But if that never happens
1172
01:10:51,054 --> 01:10:54,729
♪ Still I'll always believe
1173
01:10:54,891 --> 01:10:57,531
♪ In you
1174
01:11:02,466 --> 01:11:05,572
♪ Someone was listening
1175
01:11:05,735 --> 01:11:08,409
♪ Someone was there
1176
01:11:08,572 --> 01:11:11,075
♪ While you were whispering
1177
01:11:11,241 --> 01:11:14,313
♪ Your dreams to the air
1178
01:11:14,478 --> 01:11:17,391
♪ Someone was watching you
1179
01:11:17,547 --> 01:11:20,118
♪ And someone can say
1180
01:11:20,283 --> 01:11:24,823
♪ Your hopes and your dreams
aren't forgotten
1181
01:11:24,988 --> 01:11:30,529
♪ They might just
all come true today
1182
01:11:32,762 --> 01:11:35,766
- ♪ Someone is listening
- ♪ I have a secret
1183
01:11:35,932 --> 01:11:38,173
- ♪ Someone is there
- ♪ Christmas wish...
1184
01:11:38,335 --> 01:11:42,306
- ♪ While you are whispering
- ♪ Something that! want so much
1185
01:11:42,472 --> 01:11:44,850
- ♪ To the air
- ♪ I cannot even tell
1186
01:11:45,008 --> 01:11:47,010
♪ Someone is watching you
1187
01:11:47,177 --> 01:11:49,657
♪ And someone can say
1188
01:11:49,813 --> 01:11:53,625
♪ Your hopes and your dreams
aren't forgotten
1189
01:11:53,783 --> 01:11:59,028
♪ They might just all come true today
1190
01:12:01,258 --> 01:12:03,966
♪ Because you believe
1191
01:12:04,127 --> 01:12:06,971
♪ I'm happy to say
1192
01:12:07,130 --> 01:12:11,374
♪ Your hopes and your dreams
aren't forgotten
1193
01:12:11,535 --> 01:12:14,880
♪ And when one day that happens
1194
01:12:15,038 --> 01:12:21,045
♪ They might just all
come true today ♪
1195
01:12:35,759 --> 01:12:37,067
Mother.
1196
01:12:44,901 --> 01:12:47,006
MOTHER: Neville?
1197
01:12:48,505 --> 01:12:49,779
Your time is up.
1198
01:12:51,541 --> 01:12:54,647
Mother, what are you doing here?
1199
01:12:54,778 --> 01:12:58,692
You're not the only one that
can follow a bleeping blop.
1200
01:12:58,848 --> 01:13:01,692
Of course. Merry Christmas.
1201
01:13:01,851 --> 01:13:04,457
Don't you "Merry Christmas" me.
1202
01:13:04,654 --> 01:13:07,100
If this were a merry Christmas,
1203
01:13:07,257 --> 01:13:10,101
I would be poolside, getting a rubdown
1204
01:13:10,260 --> 01:13:13,537
from a muscular, Latin cabana boy.
1205
01:13:13,697 --> 01:13:15,298
Not freezing to death while my idiot son
1206
01:13:15,432 --> 01:13:18,777
wastes my time and fortune
looking for.. for...
1207
01:13:20,403 --> 01:13:22,849
Oh, my!
Is this...?
1208
01:13:22,973 --> 01:13:25,112
Indeed it is, Mommy.
1209
01:13:25,275 --> 01:13:27,277
Santa's sleigh, right here beneath...
1210
01:13:27,444 --> 01:13:30,050
Beneath your icy boots, yes, yes.
1211
01:13:30,213 --> 01:13:33,751
I've heard you rehearse that drivel
in the bathroom a million times.
1212
01:13:33,917 --> 01:13:35,897
Though, I must congratulate you.
1213
01:13:36,052 --> 01:13:38,054
For once, you've delivered.
1214
01:13:38,221 --> 01:13:42,692
So, you're... proud of me?
1215
01:13:42,859 --> 01:13:45,931
I'm not disappointed,
if that's what you mean.
1216
01:13:46,096 --> 01:13:49,168
After all, you're finally
following in my footsteps
1217
01:13:49,366 --> 01:13:52,404
and putting profits over people.
(CACKLES)
1218
01:13:52,569 --> 01:13:55,482
All of our aircraft will be
redesigned to these specifications.
1219
01:13:55,639 --> 01:13:58,449
Rudders and all.
St. Nick and his band of munchkins
1220
01:13:58,608 --> 01:14:01,748
will be obsolete when our fleet
of sleighs takes to the sky.
1221
01:14:01,911 --> 01:14:06,087
(CACKLES) Next Christmas, we'll be
cashing in on every Christmas wish.
1222
01:14:06,249 --> 01:14:09,696
And this place, it will make
a wonderful theme park.
1223
01:14:09,886 --> 01:14:11,888
Or perhaps a meat locker.
1224
01:14:12,055 --> 01:14:13,830
Instead of "Ho, ho, ho,"
1225
01:14:13,990 --> 01:14:15,992
they'll all be crying,
"Boo, hoo, hoo!"
1226
01:14:16,159 --> 01:14:18,070
(CACKLING)
1227
01:14:18,228 --> 01:14:20,401
Load up that sleigh and
whatever else you can find
1228
01:14:20,530 --> 01:14:22,339
and bring it back to the base.
1229
01:14:22,499 --> 01:14:26,174
The sooner we're out of this
candy cane nightmare, the better.
1230
01:14:27,837 --> 01:14:29,316
NEVILLE: No.
1231
01:14:29,472 --> 01:14:31,179
What?
1232
01:14:31,341 --> 01:14:33,878
I... I said...
1233
01:14:34,077 --> 01:14:35,681
I won't do it!
1234
01:14:35,845 --> 01:14:37,984
Santa's sleigh will remain here,
1235
01:14:38,148 --> 01:14:39,684
where it belongs.
1236
01:14:39,849 --> 01:14:43,262
MOTHER: What?
Why, you ungrateful,
1237
01:14:43,420 --> 01:14:46,333
you insolent little...
How dare you disobey me?
1238
01:14:46,489 --> 01:14:48,127
You're through, do you hear me?
1239
01:14:48,291 --> 01:14:49,964
The mind eraser?
1240
01:14:50,126 --> 01:14:51,503
- Good boy!
MOTHER: - I'll see to it you don't
1241
01:14:51,661 --> 01:14:54,870
get a whiff of your inheritance
Not a penny!
1242
01:14:55,031 --> 01:14:57,170
You'll be delivering
crates of rubber ducks
1243
01:14:57,333 --> 01:15:00,314
to Siberia by the time
I'm through with you!
1244
01:15:00,470 --> 01:15:03,178
I'll have that sleigh stripped of
its secrets and sold for scrap.
1245
01:15:03,339 --> 01:15:05,979
Mother, I'm sorry.
1246
01:15:06,142 --> 01:15:09,680
What I meant to say was,
we don't need the sleigh.
1247
01:15:09,846 --> 01:15:12,827
We've got its secret right here.
1248
01:15:12,982 --> 01:15:14,518
Give it to me!
1249
01:15:14,684 --> 01:15:17,722
It's amazing!
1250
01:15:17,887 --> 01:15:21,528
It's extraordinary!
1251
01:15:21,691 --> 01:15:23,466
What does it do?
1252
01:15:23,593 --> 01:15:26,301
Turn it on and see for yourself.
1253
01:15:26,463 --> 01:15:28,841
(GASPING)
1254
01:15:32,235 --> 01:15:33,578
(SHRIEKS)
1255
01:15:33,737 --> 01:15:36,445
Where... Where am I?
1256
01:15:36,639 --> 01:15:40,348
Uh... Your retirement party, Mommy!
1257
01:15:40,510 --> 01:15:43,684
Congratulations on
so many glorious years
1258
01:15:43,847 --> 01:15:45,986
of dedicated service.
1259
01:15:46,149 --> 01:15:49,392
Oh, yes, my retirement party.
1260
01:15:49,552 --> 01:15:51,498
How silly of me.
1261
01:15:51,654 --> 01:15:54,567
Will someone please take
Mommy back to the base?
1262
01:15:54,724 --> 01:15:57,728
Who are you adorable little children?
1263
01:15:57,894 --> 01:16:00,738
I seem to have lost my cabana boy.
1264
01:16:00,897 --> 01:16:05,039
Santa, I'm so sorry
for everything I've done.
1265
01:16:05,201 --> 01:16:06,874
And you, little elf,
1266
01:16:07,036 --> 01:16:10,506
thank you for giving me
back my Christmas spirit.
1267
01:16:10,673 --> 01:16:12,914
Merry Christmas, Neville.
1268
01:16:13,076 --> 01:16:15,215
Merry Christmas.
1269
01:16:16,112 --> 01:16:17,955
Release everyone!
1270
01:16:18,114 --> 01:16:21,254
We're going home for Christmas!
1271
01:16:21,417 --> 01:16:23,397
(ALL CHEERING)
1272
01:16:23,553 --> 01:16:25,897
- Merry Christmas!
- Merry Christmas!
1273
01:16:26,055 --> 01:16:28,092
(ALL CLAMORING)
1274
01:16:28,258 --> 01:16:29,430
(GRUNTING)
1275
01:16:32,595 --> 01:16:35,439
So you're a Director of Droppings,
1276
01:16:35,598 --> 01:16:37,441
an inventor, a time traveler,
1277
01:16:37,600 --> 01:16:38,738
and an action hero?
1278
01:16:38,902 --> 01:16:41,143
What can't you do?
1279
01:16:41,304 --> 01:16:42,749
(GASPS)
1280
01:16:53,216 --> 01:16:55,389
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
1281
01:16:55,552 --> 01:16:58,123
WOMAN: Good luck, Santa!
1282
01:17:00,490 --> 01:17:02,629
BOY: Take care, Santa!
1283
01:17:07,564 --> 01:17:09,805
Everything is set for takeoff, Santa.
1284
01:17:09,966 --> 01:17:11,639
Not everything.
1285
01:17:11,801 --> 01:17:14,281
Now we have everything.
1286
01:17:14,437 --> 01:17:17,611
- We'd better get going.
- We?
1287
01:17:17,774 --> 01:17:20,015
If you're gonna be one
of my Santech inventors,
1288
01:17:20,176 --> 01:17:23,521
you need to see this baby
in action, don't you think?
1289
01:17:24,781 --> 01:17:27,352
Me? A Santech inventor?
1290
01:17:27,517 --> 01:17:29,121
You mean...?
1291
01:17:38,995 --> 01:17:40,668
I don't know how to thank you.
1292
01:17:40,830 --> 01:17:44,471
No need. You're going to
do great things, Bernard.
1293
01:17:44,634 --> 01:17:47,240
This was just the first of them. Ho, ho!
1294
01:17:47,403 --> 01:17:48,973
Merry Christmas!
1295
01:17:49,138 --> 01:17:52,984
Merry Christmas to you, Bernard.
1296
01:17:53,142 --> 01:17:55,418
Oh, can I geta hug, too?
1297
01:17:59,349 --> 01:18:01,989
We are go for takeoff!
1298
01:18:07,690 --> 01:18:09,567
(WHISTLES)
1299
01:18:09,726 --> 01:18:11,535
Ho, ho, ho!
1300
01:18:11,694 --> 01:18:14,538
Hang on! This thing
has a time machine on it
1301
01:18:14,697 --> 01:18:16,005
but no seat belt?
1302
01:18:16,165 --> 01:18:17,906
(LAUGHING)
1303
01:18:19,068 --> 01:18:21,480
Merry Christmas to all,
1304
01:18:21,638 --> 01:18:25,108
and to all, a good night!
1305
01:19:18,127 --> 01:19:20,107
BERNARD: The present becomes the past,
1306
01:19:20,263 --> 01:19:22,641
every second of every day.
1307
01:19:22,799 --> 01:19:24,801
(SNORING)
1308
01:19:26,836 --> 01:19:30,477
But if we hold Christmas
in our hearts,
1309
01:19:30,640 --> 01:19:34,486
we have the power to
turn back time itself.
1310
01:19:51,260 --> 01:19:55,174
(♪ ASHLEY TISDALE: "SOME KIND OF MIRACLE")